No Strings Attached

We see in our society today – extra marital sex, infidelity both from within and without close relationships. Soap operas are founded on the fundamental principle of love induced infidelity. Love sanctifies everything we do. We have ended up romanticizing what would pass as injustice or downright rebellion – all in the name of love.

A candid discussion was had in our city with about 30 young people similar to many of us gathered here today – These are some of the things that came out about the sexual environment we are living in.
– A compulsion to have sex on demand
– A willingness or openness to experiment sexually
– A carefree attitude – especially when one’s partner is not in the vicinity
– Closets, rooms full of skeletons in people’s lives with regard to sexual encounters
– Fragile marriages without trust because of the past histories of the individuals – which have bred multiple elephants in the room of each marriage.
– A helpless life cycle of free sex – that is fuelled by alcohol, other substances and social pressure.
It used to be said that Love covers a multitude of sin – it seems that from much of what we see – love is the cause of much sin.

What seems to be the issue?
We have been robbed of our innocence – we were introduced to sex and sexuality early [movies, books, porn, school conversations with other kids and predatory teens, media, rape, indecent exposure by people close to us ]. We are introduced in these ways and there is no explanation or processing. As a result we have been left exposed and shamed early in our sexual lives.

Our solutions to respond to our sexual environment seem to get us nowhere –
o Feed the sexual appetite – casual sexual affairs, friends with benefits – these leave people feeling guilty, ashamed and lonely
o Let love lead – follow your heart – tends to always lead to being hurt. In the soaps people pick up after themselves. In real life, how many man [or woman] hours are lost monthly with people who cant focus on work because of heartbreak, betrayal and pain.
o Turn sex into a currency – Guys give love to get sex, girls give sex to get loved. When sex happens – guys got what they wanted, gals feel cheated and used. Use sex for academic, lifestyle, social and professional goals. In the end people get what they want but lose what they cannot get back!
o Constant seeking – sexual methods from books magazines and ancient practices, right partners, right environment, right spot, seeing sex therapists. For some reason this search is never satisfied.

Only God can make me whole again!

Scripture: Genesis 2:25-3:11

Our sexuality carries dignity – After they were created Adam and Eve were “naked without shame.” When our lives are in the centre of God’s will then there is no shame or guilt only dignity. When sex is in God’s will it will be good and dignified.
Sin has robbed us of this dignity and left us exposed 3:7 After Adam and Eve listened to the serpent then innocence was robbed and dignity went with it. When our innocence is robbed in terms of sex and our sexuality then shame takes over. Later on the pain and resistance of sin overcomes the individual.

Only God can make me whole again!

When our lives are taken over by a distorted picture of sexuality we limp along with wounds, pain and a continual thirst that can never be restored. All our solutions will be temporary and inadequate. This is not new. When Adam sinned he tried to fix the problem his own way he made fig leaves to cover for and make up for the shame. The fig leaves were temporary. God saw this and had mercy on them. The fig leaves were not going to do it. The Lord God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife and clothed them.

Only God can make me whole again!

Only returning our sexuality to God will have a lasting solution – a cover for our shame and a new beginning. God provided a temporary solution for the first Adam – he used skin to cover the shame. There was a cost because an animal had to die. In a way, this was still temporary. He then provided a permanent solution by starting over – giving up His Son to come and die, to cover our shame and pay for our sin.

When we “put on Christ” we are made anew. We start over. The old progressively goes away and the new is birthed in us. When we submit sex, our sexuality and decisions around this to Christ’s leading then we step into God’s purpose and destiny for us.

God’s solution may not be necessarily popular or even easier but it is always better. Saying no to sex outside marriage is not easy but it is the only thing that will remove the shame, guilt and indignity and restore dignity and God’s approval.

Why is sex better in God’s way – in marriage
§ There is no shame. It is legit.
§ Besides within marriage God blesses the act and even gives some encouragement about it – literally in Song of Songs. Even the Apostle Paul seems to encourage high frequency of sex among marrieds.

Only God can make me whole again!

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10 Responses to “No Strings Attached”

  1. Praying for a wife Says:

    This blog should be introduced in the education curriculum, in place of/together with set books. It would save so many of our young people stumbling into what we are going through. There are so many un-mentored youth out there.


  2. Steve Ruhiu Says:

    Whats the way forward? seems the problem is soo ingrown!


    • I believe that there are many solutions to this. I highly recommend that just as much as the Pastors tackle different topics per month, it is about time that they preached on the amazing grace of our risen Lord Jesus Christ. Romans 8 summarizes it all too. This is what Christianity is all about- His grace.

      Besides, if you look into this blog’s statistics, they illustrate how after each sermon there is always someone asking how they could get back to being a real Christian despite their many sins and how they still don’t understand the passion of Jesus. The grace and love of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ is the good news that I think everyone should get to understand before anything else is ministered to them. I know it is touched on in each sermon however how about simply focusing/narrowing down on it; Mavuno Pastors are not only well anointed but equipped for this too.

      It is a topic that most churches rarely focus/narrow down on apart from Catholics who do so during lent and advent. I think once we know His passion we get to know our true identity- who we are and whose we are and able to live this life and live it in abundance as God purposed it.


  3. “Deeply religious people have the best sex life.” Yes people, even in this God blesses us.


  4. Prayer For the Men Says:

    Lord, we pray for our males being raised without fathers or strong male influences. We speak fortitude upon their lives so they won’t be effeminate, weak minded, or have unnatural affections. We speak the strength of a leader into their lives so they can properly lead and cover the woman and children you bless them with. In Jesus Name. Mal. 4:6 And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse.


  5. Sex is best in marriage! i may not be married but i know its true. The saddest thing is that there is so much harm in our society and not all have the opportunity to hear such great message. what is there to be done to salvage our people?


  6. Sex is for married people. For me lust has always been a challenge, I feel like I have the habit kicked but as soon as I’m on my own I…..I do repent of my sins and I do believe that God has forgiven me, but I hate taking God for granted. If I did not know any better I would just live a life of sin since I am not able to live a righteous one well. I feel bad and sad and dirty but I push on.


  7. Self restraint is something that we the youth need to exercise. There will be those that Satan will send your way to tempt you with these things, but remember God’s Word which says: “Blessed is the man (woman) who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor stands in the path of sinners, nor sits in the seat of the scornful; but his (her) delight is in the law of the LORD, and in His law he (she) meditates day and night.” (Psalm 1:1-2).


  8. I have never been to your church,but Your messages through blog and YouTube transformed me. Keep on posting and may the good Lord reveal to people the truth. God bless.


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