The Father Blessing

There is a desire in every human being to be blessed by a father. Every boy grows up with one question in his heart: Do I measure up? Am I man enough? Will I succeed when it matters – as a fiancé, in my career/business, as a husband, or as a dad? Do I have what it takes? Boys play Superman or Rambo or Jack Bauer or Karate kid. Their dream is to be a man who has/is with it. That is why the greatest fear of every man is the fear of failure. And the most significant person to a boy to answer that question is the man who is supposed to be his hero: DAD. The desire for a boy or man to connect with his father is to get that validation or approval from his source.

It is different for girls. A girl’s primary occupation as she grows up is being attractive for relationship. Captivating. Irresistible. To be wanted. That is why hair, shape and skin are big for growing girls. Beauty has a high premium. Girls play the bride as little kids. A girl wants to know whether she will be loved, accepted, appreciated as a person and admitted into a secure relationship. The greatest fear of a woman is to be rejected or abandoned by the one she has given her love or heart to. It is the fear of a failed relationship.

Read Genesis 32: 22 – 31


Notice the following:

  • Verse 24 – Jacob was left alone in a reflective night. What had been his pursuit, and what had defined him in the search for blessing went ahead of him.
  • A man, God, wrestled with him – At daybreak, the man touched the socket of his heap. He needed to be broken – to realize that he needs God to satisfy his hunger. He then switched from a struggle into a cleave: I need you, my true dad. I am in need of a blessing. Bless me, Dad! I will not let you go unless you bless me, Jacob declared. (In your heart of hearts, you are looking for a dad blessing. You are fighting off lust, addictions, low self-esteem, feelings of failure… You are looking for what you didn’t get – a blessing)
  • The Blessing – What is your name? Jacob. Well said, your name will change from today. This is who you really are, Israel, a prince. You have a destiny. I know your name. Your dad may have excluded you from the blessing, but you are at the center of my plan.  Please tell me your name; I want to know you! Then he blessed him there. Finally he gets the blessing he has been searching for.

Whatever your father wound, there is hope. You have a father who wants to bless you. Jesus came here to introduce us to the father. He was without a father on earth, in a sense (Joseph was a surrogate dad). When it was time for him to hit the road and pursue his life’s purpose, he went to John the Baptist for baptism.

Read  Mark 1: 9-11.


The voice of the Father blessed him by stating 3 things:

  1. You are my son – you belong. You have identity in me. I take responsibility for you. I am committed to you. You can always count on me, to be present through your life mission. I am a son of God.
  2. Whom I love – I love you unconditionally. And always will. It is my decision; it is not about you. This gives you security and acceptance.
  3. With you I am well pleased – I approve of you. I affirm you, validate you. I am proud of you. I KNOW you can and will make it. I am cheering you. I am smiling at you and always will.

Every child needs 3 things from dad, or else he/she will spend a lifetime searching for them:

  • Belonging
  • Unconditional love and acceptance
  • Validation or approval.

In spite of your dad experience, your heavenly dad meets your need. That voice was not just for Jesus. It is for you. Receive it. Accept the blessing.
That is the father blessing we all seek for. You have it now from the father of all creation. He knows your name, loves you for free and for good, and is proud of you. Receive the blessing.

I have a DAD who loves me and believes in me!

God is spirit, and we are flesh and blood. We all long for a father figure down here, one who can hug us and communicate this blessing. What would happen, if each one of us received this blessing from God? If you believed that in spite of your dad wounds, your heavenly dad loves you, believes in you and has a plan for you? I believe we shall experience a rare confidence, the needed freedom and a fearless resolve to change the city, take the continent and change the world. This is our call: To turn ordinary people into fearless influencers. A fearless influencer is a man or woman walking in the blessing of our dad.

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36 Responses to “The Father Blessing”

  1. Dad in need Says:

    Thanks Pst. S 4 allowing God to use u in such a great way. Todays sermon was really charging but i would wish to know, how do we get to have our fathers bless us? Atleast for we who were there were challeged to call out our sons n daughters n may God give us the courage and the ability to do so with all diligence. God bles u Pst. S n long live Mavuno…….!


  2. Pastor S, this is a true manifestation of the perspective. It all started as a manifestation of hopelessness, but now there is light at the end of the tunnel. MAY god bless you and change us all to conform to HIS WILL as we proceed in this journey of transformation.


  3. WOW pastor mbevi the sermon left me in tears…..i have so longed for affirmation and acceptance from dad.i grew in a home where we were always compared to one another or the other children…that left me feeling that i was never good enoug and still leaves me feeling that i can never be like my other siblings because i dont share a good relationship with my dad like they do…..i have done some pretty ugly things and even lied to my dad and the rest of the family,but i have sought for reconcliation and forgiveness from my family.i joined mavuno church this year march and it has been life changing and yesterday during the sermon i was reminded of my father wounds which i have igorned and swept under the carpet as i struggle to be accepted for who i am but no more i know that God loves me and believes in me……i have a heavenly father who does accept as i am.thank you PASTOR SIMON may God continue to bless you.


  4. This was a powerful message Pastor S. i have learned that i need to make my daughter feel accepted and give her all the approval.
    I am trying to be a great Dad to my daughter who is now admitted in Hospital over the last one week.
    May you pray with me for a complete healing and deliverance.
    Mavuno, you are doing a great job in modelling many of us. God bls you Pastor S.


  5. I really love your series Pst S n am really encouraged that there is a Father who has faith in me,believes in me n affirms me..Though my Dad wasn’t that bad bt he was deep like Pst Carol’s Dad n used to communicate to us thru my mum(I love my mum 4 being there when I needed to be lifted)I think if my Dad had done some of the little bt valuable things that I missed in my childhood I would hav been a better person than I am now…If he had only told me that he is proud n that he approves of me I wouldn’t have done the nasty things I have done…If my Dad had impacted some basic but crucial knowledge in my life….I wish my Dad would have been more or less like Derek Redmond’s Dad…That should be a role model to most Dads in Kenya..Read the story on and watch the video on very inspiring n touching…


  6. Michael Muhato Says:

    Pastor Mbevi, you touched a nerve that I have always shyed away from. I cannot actually complain about my dad but he would have all the right to complain about me. See, I’m the 6th born in a family of 8 siblings…all the 5 ahead of me were very obedient and studious, while I on the other hand was rebellious and could not care less about school work. Basically I was always at loggerheads with my Dad. He often tried to encourage me using words and when that failed…the alternative was metted out more frequently than I would have liked. I now realize that it was all for my benefit, but back then I branded him my enemy. What a waste this was cos soon after term one of 2nd form he succumbed to diabetes. I have always wanted to apologise for my narrow mindedness and atone for my bad behaviour. Todate, all I do is work/work/work…as if to prove to him that I did not turn out to be a failure, I have completely emulated him in regards to how my home is run, how i treat my kids, routines of the home and of work etc…I wish to tell him I am sorry for all the trouble i caused him and that I have become someone worthy of his praise and blessing/s.

    On another note, I have been an on and off church goer I have not been baptised and of late I have a very strong sense that I should get baptised before the end of the year. This strong sense has me worried; for what I do not know, but it is suddenly very important to me that I get baptised ASAP.

    Pastor Mbevi, I have not been tithing as I should. I end up squandering whatever little money I get, then scrambling back onto the drawing board so-to-speak to make more. I would like to offer some form of tithe in the form of jobs for 2 youthful people for now- from your congregation to sell liquid detergents on commission. That way, I will have given someone a chance to earn a living and to make more offering & Tithe. This offer of jobs is also my way of giving back to society what society gave to me once upon a time when nothing was going right in my life.

    Please pray for me to receive the blessings I eluded, and propose the people you feel may need this job. Its not much but it is a start…which everybody needs once in a while.

    All in all I pray for you, Pastor M, Mavunites and thank you in advance for the ministering that you are doing in my life.

    Amen and Amen


    • @ Michael, please visit the Prayer tent on Sunday and meet with a Prayer counselor about your desire to get baptized. The prayer counselors are available at the end of every service and will pray with you, counsel you and help you seek God’s clarity on why you have this strong need to get baptized before end of year. I raise this because you write that this issue has got you worried.


  7. AmBlessed Says:

    thanks Pst. Simon!

    I am indeed blessed! My father (who left us 7 years ago) accepted my invitation to church.

    And when you said, tell your neighbour the best/deepest thing your dad tod you, i looked at him and a wave of appreciation followed. For as much as he has been absent for 7 years he believed in me, constantly affirmed me, Told me am sharp enough to study anything, He caled me his lovely daughter, He said He loved me, he never missed any of my visiting days or dental appointments in highschool, He said he was proud of me, He kept upto date with my life. And Right there and then I hugged him, thanked him and I forgave him. Now he lives with another woman and her three kids but I know I have a father in him. and i am still his daughter. Most of all I thank God for that miracle on sunday. I felt a weight of heaviness lift off my shoulders. ! PRAISE GOD!


  8. Dear Pastor Simon, God bless you so much for the series this month,I dont really have daddy issues my dad is the typical african man he provides but never is affectionate. Yesterday when you hugged me and blessed me, it was the most awesome experience, I couldn’t help it but break down for It felt like my heavenly father was speaking to me saying that I am beautiful, I’ll be great and fly to great heights….I feel rejuvenated and I feel like I can walk with my head held high for my daddy believes in me and affirms me, i CHERISH that moment and always will.THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU


  9. Dear Pastor Mbevi,

    Thank you for the inspiring sermon on project DAD. Hugs, love, encouragement and affirmations are indeed important to a child in today’s’ world and can make the difference between a well adjusted individual and a maladjusted one.
    There is a generation however now currently in their 70’s to 80’s who were culturally socialized differently from today’s modern parent. I am 53years old and a product of this mode of parenting which did not openly express its emotions. They kept their emotions under a tight lid and simple expressions like “I love you” let alone a hug did not exist. My father has never openly expressed love or hugged any of us and now that he is 80 it’s doubtful that he will. He however exposes it covertly through his deeds/actions. Women however are more flexible and mother made a deliberate effort to learn/change and now hugs all her loved ones. Unbelievably despite this earlier lack of expression they were God fearing incredibly responsible, caring and loving parents. We never lacked anything, they were always present for the family and they sent us to the best educational institutions in Kenya and the world.
    This caring and love has extended to their grandchildren. An example in point was when our University student son had a motor a non-injury motor accident in Prince Edward Island, Canada last year. We talked to both our son and daughter via telephone after the event and they confirmed that he was fine apart from the vehicle which was written off. Upon informing mother she did not appear altogether satisfied with this explanation. Thereafter on her own volition she secretly travelled to Canada; visited them for a week and made the gracious step of purchasing a replacement vehicle for him. To us this enormous sacrifice of time and resources was a tremendous act of love. We concur with psychoanalyst and author Dr. Scott .M. Peck when he states that love is not a “feeling” but a “continuous act of caring even during times when loving feelings have ebbed or faded”.
    My purpose of writing this mail is to discount the notion that all of the people who do not openly or visibly display emotion are unloving. They just didn’t know anything better as regards overt expressions yet they can be very loving and when one is amongst them it is almost palpable. It is like one can actually feel it and after such an experience one feels highly energized and elated with positive feelings of love. God Bless.
    DAUDI MWENDA. P.O.BOX 24943-00502 NAIROBI. CELL: 0722 154 722.


    • Thanks for sharing Mr.Mwenda. I am truly blessed and encouraged by your story.I agree with what you are saying.especially as it concerns our parents, most f them didnt just know how to do it. Their love for us though not expressed is truly unquestionable.
      May God bless you and your family richly. I pray that your son will be totally healed and blessed. May you be a model indeed not only to the younger generation but also to other men. God bless


    • Hey,I want to thank you for your very well expressed thoughts on covert loving fathers.What I also find and would like to add,is that we live in a world that is constantly changing.To give my example,I married a man raised in a home where showing affection (any differently from bringing home the much appreciated provision of meat and asking after the cows upon arrival from a three week trip abroadat the airport..) was an absolute no-no.It sucked.Granted action will always speak louder than words.As a woman,I certainly want more than words..yet I have a need for affection that would actually include hearing I love you and not just when the man is slurring. so where do I go? Should I supplement it with a toy boyfriend? Flirt? What ..pretend this need doe not exist?Kill it? What to do with my hopeless romantic self.My spouse was raised differently I too endeavor to learn how to communicate with him in a manner that speaksto hisperson.Shouldn’t he as well appreciate my longing for overt display of love asmuch as Irecognise his predisposition to a covert manifestation? Both forms can be authentic.Let our men appreciate the need to ‘move with the cheese’even in our African set up.Embrace change..speak up those words your sons/daughters need to hear and occassionally openly display love it won’t kill you.That goes too for all the mucho women out there.


  10. thanks pastor S,the sermon was great.i left there happy knowing that i av a father who loves me.
    be blessed.


  11. Wow pst s the sermon was meant for me especially after watching Man Enough DVD on father wounds which i have struglin with in my relationship .i God’s love and affirmation and after you hugged me i felt released frm some kind of bondage right now i need to have a man to mentor and walk with me as i realised only a man can call out another man . Guys hook me up with a spiritual DAD


    • I thank God for what he is doing in your life. True to his word he is moulding and shaping us every moment to be what he wants us to be.
      If you know about Gideon’s Torch it is an amazing forum where men meet to pray and share. Every Wednesday 5am we pray, build one another and share. I met one of my mentors in GT and i know you will also so try it out. God bless


  12. Thank you Pst S for accepting God’s call to teach & preach this powerful sermon of Project Dad. As I sat on Sunday listening about Father blessings, I was shocked at how deeply I felt that I want a father hug and father blessings. Something I never got from my earthly father who passed away 2 years ago.
    Pst. Njoro, may God bless you so much for giving of yourself on Sunday. Thank you for standing in the gap as my father and giving me words of affirmation, healing and prophesy from my Father – God. Those words touched the core of my heart. I cried tears but they were of thanksgiving and humility to know that my Father in heaven was with me when I was a lonely hurting lost girl and that He cared. To hear His words of affirmation, approval, identify and blessing was exactly what I needed.
    God bless you beloved Pastors and may you continue to do God’s work. I pray that He reward you greatly and abundantly.


  13. “As your Dad, I never blamed you for anyhting…all you ever said or wrote compounded to “a son’s reaction.” You’re fine with me and I loved you always.”
    That was my dad’s reaction after i resolved to make contact with him after being away from us for 23 years,i left church on Sunday feeling that God wanted me to let my father know how i felt about him(any bitterness i harbored,anger ,resentment towards him etc).I also let him know that I’ve forgiven him and i always pray for him to encounter Christ”s love and forgiveness like i did,in the process i also asked for forgiveness and made it clear to him that despite everything i honour him coz that’s what God expects of me.
    I could tell from his reply that he was moved by what i had to say,and though He’s in a far country he has requested for a Father son talk via phone.
    Thank god Mavuno Church for project DAD.
    Mavuno Mashariki.


    • Thank God for you Edu. May God complete the work that he has began and may you be released to fly and be all that you were meant to be in Christ. We are praying with you.


  14. Thanks Pastor Mbevi.


  15. anonymous Says:

    hey pastor S, my name is anonymous and i am confused.. I have the best father in the whole wide world who has always been there for me, who has loved me unconditionally and told me am beautiful and what confuses me is the person i have become. when i was growing up i was like the ugly duckling and when i matured i sprouted into a beautiful girl. men sought me and in order not to dissapoint them i engaged in sexual relations with them and now, i am 23 and have slept with 15 men. i got pregnant twice by different men and aborted both times.. now i am in a relationship where i am some how frustrated because i expect the man to love me unconditionally but he keeps blaming his actions on the fact that he had no personal relationship with his parents and he is just hard core. i am sleeping with him but i am not happy at all. i know i am sinning but i dont know how to get out.. i need help.. please pray for me….. thanx and God bless.


    • @ Anonymous, thanks for being bold enough to share your story on the blog. Its so encouraging to hear that you had such a good dad who has always loved and affirmed you. You are really blessed.

      You are at the right place.The fact that you came to church indicates that you are seeking for answers, for God and you will surely find Him. He knows the deepest hunger and desires of your heart and he wants to set you free. Look up to him; he will never reject a broken and contrite spirit. Ask him to come and show you the way because he is able. We have prayer counsellors every Sunday in church. We are there to talk and pray and encourage you. Please come to the tent after whichever service you attend and talk to one of the counsellors.

      We are praying with you. And you know something else? To your Father in heaven you are not anonymous. he knows your name; in fact your name is written at the palm of his hands and he loves you regardless of what you have done. God bless.


  16. Pastor S thank you so much for the sermon. It means so much for so many, myself included. I am not so sure what to say because i do not want to say i have a father wound because to say so would be unreasonable. However, my life is a clear indication that i have been wounded.
    My father died when i was 3(am now 40), i together with my 5 siblings, was raised by my Mum who made such a good job of it that when i grew up i went about ensuring that i became a single mother(now of 3). That tells some of the story but not all of it.
    I have repented and repeatedly sought God’s forgiveness for how my children came to be, but who do i blame for the wounds i have, although now healed? Its not my father’s fault he died and i therefore had noone to tell me who i am and that i am not meant to sleep with the first man that says i love you. its not his fault that all the men i have dated, and indeed slept with do not care about their offspring and thus ensuring the cycle is repeated.
    i am born again and now know that my Father in heaven loves me, that He shall never forsake me, that He knows who i am and where i am going. However there is a gap, a need, a longing, an emptiness, a thirst to have that connection with a man, one to tell me he loves me for me, that i am his dream gal, that i am beautiful, that he shall protect me, that i can be……..
    I was too scared to come infront.
    Pray for me and my children.


    • @ Jane,you and each of your kids are so precious and loved.This month I have met a number of men and women who are coming out of their situations confronting them as bravely as you have and no doubt we have a Heavenly,ETERNAL Father who knows each and every oneof our names.He is not in the business to picking the perfect but perfecting the picked (chosen)..that would be the likes of u and I.Don’t I wish I had my own children.The minute my last grandparent died all I wanted was to have a child…after my divorce that sadly is not possible now.Believe me I have considered and surveyed potential fathers before I gave up my agenda for God’s.I even had my aunt ‘advice ‘ me to go ahead and have a child out of wedlock since ‘I had previously had a wedding’…talk about pressure! You already have three lovely children even if their absent father or fathers don’t know what they eat/how they school,what they aspire for,what they love/fear etc which is tragic :yet the four of you are still family .I don’t have that anymore no family to call my own,messed up or not.And maaan whenever I watch kids with their loving parent/s my nostalgic heart is warmed.Celebrate the good.Its so hard to forgive ourselves yet its so factual God has forgiven us.So tell that nasty gremlin that keeps reminding u of your past,God threw it into the seaof forgetfulness and remind Jane to quit going to retrieve it.This Project Dad series is so vital and hey look we are on the road to recovery.Keep walking.


  17. Hey Pastor S. Thank you for your poignant sermon. It reminded that Dad’s are a great treasure. My Dad passed on 10 years ago and I am glad to say we had a great relationship. He was my greatest cheerleader, always believing in me and urging me on to vistas he himself had not explored. The sermon on Sunday brought home the fact that though I have the beautiful memories from Dad to spur me on, I have been living on empty fumes. I had not expected to cry and yearn for a hug as I did. I came forward for a hug and it made a great difference but even so I realize the need to find a Spiritual Dad to step in during the next important transitions in my life.

    Regardless of the crying, I was truly blessed. Asante.


  18. BROKEN MAN Says:

    Hi Pst S kindly help me i grew up without a dad and always felt the odd one out in the crowd from primary to now.i never had a father to call me out and as a result i developed pink men qualities .in my 1st relationship in quest to be affirmd i made my girl friend pregnant and we later aborted ,in my second relationship i strived to leave God’s way and even dedicated the relationship to God only to end up making out with my girlfriend which made her have a low selfesteem and hate herself as we both are xtians n have a personal relationship with God, among other father wound issues we both have.we broke up a month a go and i feel i cant go on with life like this,i dont know what to do,where to go ,who to see i dont know if God will bless me or use me after all these please help me am dying on the inside and i need help!


  19. Dear PST S,
    What an amazing October it has been for me…..thank you for the Sermon series!
    Last Sunday was particularly important to me, as i listened to you i couldn’t help but think how absent my dad was while i was growing up,though he played his role as a protector and provider very well.Many are the times we used mum so that we could get thru to him…Tears rolled down my eyes as i imagined if he was the kind of father you were taking about……

    As i looked for a sense of belonging,validation,someone to tell me am beautiful,i found myself with the wrong men who left wounds which am trying to heal now.My self esteem was down to zero though i could look at myself in the mirror i couldn’t feel beautiful,
    When you asked people to be left behind for a hug i felt wow that was the most genuine hug i have ever hard i felt beautiful when u said am his dream girl….. i now know i have a father in heaven who loves me!!
    My father passed on earlier this year my his soul rest peace, but now i have another spiritual daddy you passie!! Thank you for standing for up on behalf of men who have left wounds that are healing now!!


  20. thanks pastor S,for that amazing i listened to you on Sunday,i couldn’t help but thank God for blessing me with such a wonderful father.i acknowledge that i have an amazing father who is more than a father.i take him to be my best friend because he is the type of a person who is free with us as children.he is open to us and me in particular because am the first daughter and with two young girls behind me and a elder father will not be ashamed to discuss anything with it sex,relationships.HIV/AIDS,reasons relationships didn’t work in the past etc.when you find me and my father having a conversation one would wonder.i love the fact that my father is so close to us because it assures him that nothing bad will happen to us we hide it from him.ever since we were small girls,my father kept telling us we are beautiful and we should not let anyone lie to us that we are not beautiful.i remember one day when he told us to be looking at ourselves in the mirror every morning to appreciate our beauty.He always tells me i have potential and i can achieve what other may think i cant.he believes so much in us as kids and i wonder what more i would want from him.i love the way he blesses us by telling us we have potential and that we are so beautiful because it shows that he appreciates us and we should not settle for less.i have been in 2relationships in my life and during my last relationship in March this year,i remember the guy i was dating at the time telling me as so close to my father and the way he said it made it look as though he was complaining because to be honest my ideal man has to be more of my father.reason being that he is the type of a man i respect so much and would love to have a husband who treats his kids like my father if not exactly.a man who is proud of his family especially his children,who will always be there for them in happiness and sod moments.a man who will bless them instead of cursing them.i remember at that time when i was dating this 2rd guy,he once told me i will marry my father which really hurt me…..after pastor S,preached about the types of DADS then i discovered he reason my boyfriend at the time said could be because of the father he has.the sermon on the types of Dads explained to me and i totally forgave him….i bless my father and i appreciate him in every way.He is rarely around due to his job but the moment he is town,we are always together.when he sends texts or emails he will always tell me how much he loves me,appreciates me and how God blessed him with three beautiful daughters and a handsome son.he is one in a million…


  21. Today, I am just jazzed.

    I buried my dad yesterday. And the preparation since I last shared has been along the lines of honouring him. It was mostly trial and error yet a very interesting journey. I am truly grateful to the suggestions and prayers from friends which I considered as marching orders.

    Today, I am just jazzed.

    Yesterday, a door opened just as an old one closed. In burying him, I said goodbye to a past I have made very significant. In taking my son to the funeral I said hello to a future for and with my son.

    Yaani, today, I am just jazzed

    Because I feel like I was at a bash rather than a funeral. But more than that, it was an answered prayer. After Sunday’s sermon I asked in prayer, for God to show me in my reality or at my level how exactly He loves me and believes in me. Yesterday he did just that.

    And, today, I am just jazzed


    • My sincere condolences on the loss of your dad.May you find deep peace and comfort from your Heavenly Father.Sometimes the period after the burial/funeral is the hardest.Learningtolive without our loved one,that reality sinking in,so I pray you find divine strength and relief as God has promised… Psalm 146.9 says..The Lord watches over the strangers;He relieves the fatherless and widow;but the way of the wicked He turns upside down.


  22. Pastor S, you and Sophie are doing an awesome work in this nation.Asante for also taking this mesage out to our brothers in high schools and beyond.The need is so great,may providence be yours because only the owner of the cattle on a thousand hills can fund the lifelong requirements of project dad.I believe He also wants us to use resources He has entrausted us with to whip out those cheque books/zap/mpesa resources for this great work.I choose to be one of these channels for Transform Kenya.I look forward to hearing how I can sustainably do this next Sunday.


    • Thanks for the amazing ministry that you are doing on the blog may God richly bless you. Did you manage to get info on how you can partner with Transform Kenya. You can contact the office at:

      The Navigators, Along Kindaruma Road,
      Kamburu Drive, off Ngong Road.
      CELL: 0723-457645
      Landline: 020-2525635

      Plus please contact Linda the pastoral trainee for Prayer Ministry would like you to be part of the Prayer Counselling online.

      God bless.


  23. Pastor S,

    I thank God for the truths being communicated through the sermon series. My Dad who died about one and a half years ago had his shortcomings. However one of the clear things I know is that he loved us his kids dearly, and never hesitated to say so. Today just as then, the words of my dad stating he loved me so much still ring in my head. Though I miss him deeply and sometimes find myself shedding a few tears, I appreciate his input in me (& my siblings) through his encouragement, motivation and expressed love. Dad for some reason unlike some in his generation (he died at 70) knew the importance of affirmation of his kids. I pray that all dad’s who have been listening to you will act on what they have heard.

    On a lighter note… I almost came up for a hug and told my husband as much! That was a bold gesture that was an act of real ministry to many.



  24. 2019
    Thanks. Nota Bene that I was writing about another generation. God blessed me with the ability to change and adapt. Our sons and daughters will confirm that we are modern parents. It has its challenges but the joy of a closely knit relationship overrides all. God bless.


    • Bwana Mwenda..its easy to see you are a different dad/parent/s.My wish is that we would know more of this in Kenya and beyond.That generation you write about continues to influence society greatly…my own precious grandad and many relatives actually even my grandmother exhibit what you describe.And I know they loved us. I feel you and your point,hope you also seewhere I …we are coming from.Thank you for sharing.


  25. This message on father’s is very timely, especially for us as Africans. My dad wasn’t abusive physically but he was (and still is) very harsh and can start yelling uncontrollably even in front of visitors for the smallest thing.

    He does say very discouraging things to us and my mum when there are visitors.

    He also hasn’t been very good to my mum. She’s struggled so much for things that my father could but chose not to do for her.

    I guess in the community/clan being nice to your wife is a sign of weakness.

    Today I have forgiven all although I still feel afraid of him because although he’s born again, he’s still very harsh – he only stopped drinking.

    I do pray for him everyday, and also for my mum but although we do talk, it never goes beyond sharing information!

    Can an old dog learn new tricks? Maybe, but I do pray everyday for my children and husband so that this cycle of super harshness comes to an end in my generation.

    My grandmother also felt the same abuse from grandfather, he denied her and her children food, abused her in front of people, and beat her up regularly.


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