What’s A Father Got To Do With It?
Father in OT Hebrew is Abba, and in NT Greek pater. These two denote the following concepts: source, sustainer, nourisher, supporter, founder and protector. Other words related to father are: progenitor implying the initiator and supporter of generations. Ancestor, meaning ‘to go before’ or ‘precede’. At the start of an ancestral line is a father. Dad gives a generation identity, a standard. A genealogy is nothing but a long list of guys who were sons then eventually became fathers.
Dad is destiny!
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What are the roles of a Dad?
- Protector – He is a covering over his offspring. He is a warrior who keeps danger away; a guard at the gate. Adam was told to watch over the garden. He fights for his own against abuse, misuse, the lies of the media, bullies, drugs, bad habits, etc.
- Provider – A father sustains what is named after him. Provision is more than material things. A dad provides vision, counsel, leadership, companionship and insight. It is wrong to have a lady nurse the baby and go work 12 hrs a day to provide for family. Ladies can supplement, but the provision for the family is a man’s job. That is why poverty and joblessness emasculates men. Noah tilled the land and fed his family. It is hard being dad…
- Priest – A real man connects the family with higher power. He prays for them. Teaches them the word and shows them what God looks like. Man, take your kids to church. Teach them values. And model for them those values. Correct or discipline them. Buy them a bible and take them to church functions. Be the Priest. Noah made sacrifices for his family and connected them to God. See Hebrews 11:7. (By faith Noah, when warned about things not yet seen, in holy fear built an ark to save his family. By his faith he condemned the world and became heir of the righteousness that comes by faith. Job (1:5) did the same. During the Passover (Ex. 12), dad gave the sacrifice for the family. Ephesians 6:4 – Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Joshua said, I and my family, we will serve the Lord. Deuteronomy 4:9 – Teach the traditions of the faith to the kids Psalm 78: 3ff What we have heard and known, what our fathers have told us. We will not hide them from their children; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the LORD, his power and the wonders he has done. He decreed statutes for Jacob and established the law in Israel, which he commanded our forefathers to teach their children, so the next generation would know them, even the children yet to be born, and they in turn would tell their children. Then they would put their trust in God and would not forget his deeds but would keep his commands.
- Prophet – A prophet speaks words of guidance, encouragement and hope to the people. Tell your kids who they are – call them out. Speak destiny into them. Adam named the animals, his wife and eventually his kids. Rachel named her last child ‘man of sorrows’ but the dad, Jacob renamed him ‘Man of my strength’. And that’s what Benjamin became. (See Genesis 35) Promote your seed, open doors for them, and prepare them for the future. The names a dad calls his children and the words he says to them have the power to affect their destiny. Promote your kids.
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- October Series Ad – Project D.A.D. : Who’s Your Daddy?
Blog.Mavuno 
October 12, 2010 at 11:02 am
Couldn’t help it, sent it to my friends and its on my blog. Hope that’s ok. Cant express how much I am looking forward to this season!! Bod bless you all 🙂
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October 12, 2010 at 11:12 am
I do think the issue of working long hours contributes to depreciating moral values in our society,but how else are we to provide for our families in this economy?
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October 12, 2010 at 11:19 am
Am david.and am born again in Jesus Christ.that was realy ecouraging.i am a dad,and my daughter is one year and five months.i had to take notes revice for guidance.your realy making me to be a good dad.i do read your blogs and evendhow am a house of grace member but God is one and wisdom goes to those who believe.i feel blessed.
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October 12, 2010 at 11:51 am
a true defining moment for us young men….. we have never been taught and this is a moment we treasure and it will affect generations to come through us being fathers
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October 12, 2010 at 3:33 pm
Dad to be
The sermon was moving, what a great time to be at mavuno, can’t wait for the one with solutions because as things stand now we are all guilty, how do one balance job, school, family, friends and other social demands and still remain a great dad.
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October 12, 2010 at 8:54 pm
Hi, I’ve heard little mention on the relationship btw a father and his son. I think the father-son relationship is an understated unexplainable phenomenon that the absence or abuse of it can destroy many a child/boy/son. I believe that there is a father’s destiny wired in every man, probably much more than in women. Remember the time Rudisha was received after breaking the world record. Remember the many instances of Jesus and the Father in the new testament, wow, the thought of it brings tears to my eyes. enough said. Great sermon
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October 13, 2010 at 7:58 am
Pst S
RESPECT!!!! great word
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October 13, 2010 at 8:44 am
Hi I enjoyed and learnt alot from Sunday’s sermon on project dad. Looking forward to the rest of the sermons. Keep it up Pastor S and God continue blessing you.
Pastor Simon maybe you could consider inviting Josaya Wasonga (who writes Fatherhood 101 on Wdenesday’s Daily Nation) for an interview in one of the coming sermons so that he can share his experiences and wisdom. From what I read from his column I think he is an authority on what to be a ‘dad’ really means. Even his column today has alot to do with what was preached on sunday.
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October 13, 2010 at 9:58 am
Pastor Mbevi your sermon inspired me to write an article in the 16 of the Standard Newspaper on 13th October 2010. The same is attached below.
The golden era of the girl child is upon us; the recently promulgated Constitution will undoubtedly spur gender parity in every area of our national arena. High voltage energy from the Kenyan girl-child is being felt in every sphere. The performance of our girls at the current Commonwealth games is but a sneak preview of what is to come. The girl child has arrived and there is no looking back!
The boy child on the other hand is facing the greatest challenge yet. His pole position on the podium is no longer guaranteed. Indeed he is close to being regarded as an under-performer. The term “stronger sex” is proving to be both a misnomer and a curse as recent developments and circumstances have shown there is nothing weak about the girl child. Girls are now dominant in most tertiary institutions and their domination in the employment field is only a matter of course and time. The boy child is beginning to take the form of an endangered species. Perhaps it is time to consider alternative affirmative action programs before the boy child drops off the national radar altogether.
Various reasons have been proffered regarding the wane of the fortunes of the boy child. The biggest single denominator however has been the failure of the Kenyan man as a husband, a father and a role model. The current male generation has failed its mate(s) and children in failing to lead the family unit as protector, provider, spiritual adviser and role model. As a result women have been forced to play a double role as most men are absent in the upbringing of their children. Their children’s perception of the role of a male is therefore distorted and at most blurred.
Statistics provided by Pastor Simon Mbevi of Transform Kenya indicate that Eighty (80%) of the inmates at Industrial Area Prison and Remand Home, Nairobi are children of single parents. The same is true of Correctional Facilities in the United States of America. By running away from responsibility and abdicating their parental roles men are almost surely condemning their children to a lawless existence. The same men have become serial child abusers and defilers. Children from these families are more likely to abandon school, engage in drugs and illicit sex and are more likely to pregnate and be impregnated thus continuing the vicious cycle. They are also more susceptible to homosexuality and other negative vices.
Unless the Kenyan man wakes up and amends his ways and performs his true role we shall continue to subject the male child to a precarious and dangerous existence. Little wonder that the modern day Robin Hoods’ or “Sonkos” are becoming the role models to our youth. As matters stand Kenya is headed to a reckless “gangster style” community.
DAUDI MWENDA. P.O.BOX 24943-00502 NAIROBI. CELL: 0722 154 722
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October 14, 2010 at 3:31 pm
Nice Article Daudi
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October 13, 2010 at 12:37 pm
I thank God that he has placed on Pst. S heart to tackle this very importanat topic yet again. Dad series is an issue so close to my heart becoz what my father was determined what i turned out to be before i gave my life to Christ and got to know that our utmost Dad is God himself nomatter what our biological fathers have been. My appeal to men is to please take your positions in society becoz you determine the outcome of all of us. Dads are like God to their children and even their wives. We look upto you our dear men. Its time to the change the destiny of the next generations!
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October 13, 2010 at 5:59 pm
Pst S, we’re ever thankful for the God in you. Be encouraged that you’re doing a good work, none of it is in vain.
Let me share one woman’s perspective from the preaching. It’s great that you were able to define what a man should be, now we have a better understanding of what we should pray on and call out of the men in our care.
What struck me the most is that it takes so much to be a real man! So many times us women, we pull and tear down men with our words and expectations without taking a moment to think just what it takes to be him.
After the sermon I’m purposing to be more deliberate in how I treat the men around me, be it husband, brother or friend. To understand their calling, and doing my best not to be a hindrance but rather a vessel for God to bring out the 4 P’s in them. May God help me and all His daughters, to be Queen Esther’s to our Kings.
The relationship between Father/Child is indeed a precious, formative one and I pray that through your sermon, God will speak to Fathers that they may understand that the nurturing role is not only the mother’s, but that the Father’s impact in a child’s life is so unique……and so vital to the overall well being and person that a child becomes.
God continue to bless and use you Pastor S.
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October 14, 2010 at 1:41 am
Hey Pastor S, Great Sermon. I was thinking about what you said, the fact that so many of the prisoners in Kenyan Jails and probably many jails around the world, can root the cause of their problems to their daddy issues. Earlier the service leaders had said Prisoners need mental rehabilitation. So if that’s the case, then shouldn’t Mavuno purchase the Gideons Torch books and create a reading culture in the Prisons that can help them deal with their family issues as opposed to buying potted plants and table tennis equipment which still doesn’t help them deal with their issues. Then they can also read Engaging the City, where they probably stole the love out of people like Richie and become part of the change when they are released back into it. I think it would even be better to buy them a TV and DVD and provide them DVD’s of some of these great Mavuno sermons to help them deal with their daddy issues that may have landed them in prison in the first place. I thank God I had a great dad, he had his flaws, but he loved me to deathf…that has helped me accept God’s love for me irrespective of my sin-fullness. Now that’s a fathers love!
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October 15, 2010 at 8:54 pm
Great idea Muthoni
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October 14, 2010 at 2:36 pm
Thank god for pastor S..The sermon was great though at times i felt out of place esp the time that people were asked to share what names they called their dads…..i have never been raised by my dad.I have my mom and my two sisters.No any father figure stepped up to be a father to us..
I knew my father when i was in form 2 actually by accident (thats a story for another day)…after which he “dissapeared” till i finished form four…he comes and goes as he pleases bt he has never spent a night at our home (in total maybe 7 times a year + a merry christmass sms),cones my mum then flees and nowhere to be found…i see him in town and we can just pass each other like total strangers…
he has NEVER spent a dime on us!….
my mom is our bread winner..may god bless her and give her many more years to see her great great grand kids..she does not have a well paying job but atleast we have a diploma certifictes both me(22yrs) and my elder sister(24yrs)..the last born is in form four so remember her in your prayers…my elder sister is looking for a job..i have a not so well paying job but atleast i chip in with the expenses….
The one question i asked my father is why he abandoned us his answer was he was retrenched and thats why he couldnt provide for us….i felt he could have had a better excuse than that!……
i guess you can say am okey bt one thing i know…one day i will have to choose a better dad for my kids if i will have any…i dont resent men…bt if you are a dad and you have kids…own up to your RESPONSIBILITY!!!
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October 14, 2010 at 3:50 pm
WOW! Indeed God works in amazing ways, Glory be to his name! As am typing this am listening to Bebe Winan’s song in Harm’s way. In the Chorus he is asking himself, what kind of love made him stay out of harm’s way?
That was the feeling I had when I heard this sermon on Sunday, with tears rolling down my eyes, i remembered each and every single word that my dad used to tell me, his guidance, advise and concern for my life. Did I rebel, well ooh yes I did, and HARD it was. Fast forwarding, I Did mizizi earlier this year, re committed my life to Christ and now my Dad and I are best of friends! The sermon highlighted to me how fortunate and lucky I am to still have him guide me, and how God’s Love saved me from Harm’s way!
My Dad is a Pastor and I now understand where my calling is. I am serving in Mizizi and am praying that God will use me to mentor, guide, transform and win souls for the kingdom of heaven. As proverbs 13:22 says: A good man leaves an inheritance for his children’s children, I believe I have found my inheritance and I thank God for using you Pastor S to deliver that powerful message. God Bless you.
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October 14, 2010 at 4:03 pm
@ Pst. S, u r anointed and highly favored. Keep up the gud work. My take out for last week is this: the worst form of child abuse is neglect, and a bad example.
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October 14, 2010 at 10:52 pm
I’m a young man looking forward to marrying soon. I have listened to teaching on manhood but maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan I have NEVER felt t:e weight of responsibility like that! I sank into my chair mpaka my fiance was encouraging me after service.
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October 15, 2010 at 9:51 am
hi Pastor Si,
you know, when you’ve been coming to mavuno as long as i have, some of these things like you taught on sunday, they honeslty dont come as a suorise, mavuno has become life a school where every pastor plays the role of a life coach in my life. and i kid you not that even my family has felt the impact. my father wound goes back to when we did the prison break series. funny enough i came to mavuno as rebellion against my father, as an indivudual he was really a nice guy, but as a step father, the sight of him would make me recoil, i guess i at that point had a better relationship with the shop keeper than i did my dad.
then mizizi happened, unlike others who are all excited about graduating from the class, i was terrified. i was going back to the same house with a man with all this authority over me, a man i resented and didnt talk to, a man who would find evey opportunity to shout at me and throw me a really hurtful word here and there. please dont be fooled and think that i was a simple innocent by-stander. oh no… lashed back, every chance i got. the most annoying part about it all was that in as much as i resented the guy, i badly longed for his approval. that was even more painful. it even affected my dating life. i couldnt trust that a man could love me, just for love’s sake. i found it totally unreal. so i was for a long time the coldest girl around. the hurt and bitterness i had from a man who was meant to love me, meant that another man out there who owed me nothing, woould do quite a number on me.
But Pastor Si now, im singing a different tune. i realise that God showed me favor than i could ever imagine because i have heard major horor stories of the real step dad. its like after mizizi something happened to both me and my dad, the most interesting thing is that i cant remember asking God to work out my realtionship with my dad. all i remember doing was letting go. and saying,,I DONT CARE ANY-MORE.but you would be amazed today if you watched me and my dad hanging out. i guess its true that God knows us and whats good for us. because he did what my mom can only term as miraculous, more so for her coz she was always caught in the middle. yaani my dad is one of my best friends today, i know who he is as a person, i know what he likes i respect. love and honor him. i do him proud and he gives me a hug, hemakes my smile. and best of all he brought the presence of God into a home that badly needed peace.
Now a little note for all the single men who will get to read this, dont get it twisted such that, when you’ve done your thing in the club and the street, you finally come to church to get you a nice woman who’ll initaite you into a prayerful life. that’s not how it works. dont try and de-code the man’s place by playing by your own rules. the lord is the only one who’ll teach you man-hood, and you’ll grow to be the man in your own life. only then will you be a man in a deserving woman’s life.
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October 15, 2010 at 4:45 pm
Very humbling. As a Dad I fall short and walk with my head folded downwards as these standards are too high for human beings. Protect when they intentionally take risks. Provide even when they are unreasonable in their demands. A priest over those who don’t want to believe and a prophet over those who will scorn and laugh in your face. It is hard to admit you have a family after realising how worthless you are. God help us.
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October 15, 2010 at 5:10 pm
Hi all
@ daudi, good job, good article.
Thanks all for sharing real stories. I trust it will get deeper every week.
The healing will come for those who hurt, and the rest of us will be encouraged to play our role.
Bless you all.
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October 16, 2010 at 12:00 pm
I cant wait for the rest of the series
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October 17, 2010 at 2:57 pm
Todays sermon was on point 4 me. I thought i had my own on track (R/ship btwn me n my father), but i realized that i’ve been hurting, and it also explains a lot about my character! Planning to reconnect. Thanx
May god bless you PST S.
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October 17, 2010 at 9:40 pm
Pastor S, your sermon today was like a knife cutting through flesh. Am one of the ladies that have refused the father for my child to see his daughter. I do know that i have to forgive but its really hard.
I have leaved with bitterness and anger for 3 and a half year (that’s how long my daughter;s being around- (i thanks and praise God for her). Its being 5 year from when we were diagnosed to be +ve, i found out first, we were leaving in different towns, i called the man asked him to come over, gave him the news, the next day we went to the clinic and he too tested +ve. later that day, we sat done and discussed our situation and decided that we will go back home speak to our parents about marriage, and pledged to be there for each other. But that was not to be, the man never seem to change his way. couple of year later i was with child, long story short, he decided he cant commit to being faithful. he spent most of his time out there “working”……. I ended up paying the hosipiital bill(CS) myself, he has contributed once for the upkeep for his daughter, once. She is three and 6 months.
How am i to let this man see or spend time with my precious child. How can i forgive……..knowing he cant be trusted, he’s not responsible and knowing what he is doing out there …… I have sworn never to fall in love again, i don’t have any friend and cant stand the male species, i just accommodate them coz i cant avoid them. I have also sworn that he will not see his daughter unless he fully takes responsibility for her, at the back of my mind i know that will not happen, but after your sermon today, my heart was very very heavy coz all i could think of is, what future am i laying for my daughter. What foundation am i laying for her.
Its really hard but am hoping and trusting that God will come through for me. I know i cant change my situation. I know am blessed and highly favored, just being here is a blessing and i ask for your prayers for healing so that i can stop destroying my daughter’s future. i don’t want her to grow up looking for love in the wrong places, or worse hating all male species. Please pray for me….
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October 18, 2010 at 10:05 am
@ Blessed and highly favored child of God, that is very encouraging! Remember, as your situation stands right now, it is you daughter’s future that is on the line. Your responsibility as a mother is to do everything in your power to make it better for her. The Lord is showing you the way through His messenger, Pastor S. I know it is hard to forgive, but remember forgiveness releases us to achieve our purpose. God is love, your love for your daughter is a reflection of God Himself and with it you should be able to overcome your hatred for the man who hurt you and in extension men in general.
Let go and let God!
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October 18, 2010 at 12:37 pm
A family friend invited my family & l to what l thought would be an ordinary Sunday Service, looking upon God to bless us and thanking Him for the past week. That wasnt to be. It was a heart-to-heart conversation about Project DAD. I was overwhelmed, often shedding a tear and just seeing how short l have fallen on the yard stick. Enroute home, l asked my wife where she would rank me on a scale of 1 to 10. She said 7! That was a bit of a consolation.
I am attending Mavuno the whole month, just so that l get the full picture. I have invited a couple of daddies too to share the challenge. God so richly bless you Pastor S!
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October 24, 2010 at 8:11 pm
God bless u Pst. S, This sermon series is really challenging n more a wake up call to us dads in this generation where we r so busy to fend for the family n risk not being the father figure we r supposed to be. May the almighty grant us wisdom to be what we nid be…..men, tuombeni…..!
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October 25, 2010 at 12:25 pm
Dear Pastor Mbevi,
Thank you for the inspiring sermon on project DAD. Hugs, love, encouragement and affirmations are indeed important to a child in today’s’ world and can make the difference between a well adjusted individual and a maladjusted one.
There is a generation however now currently in their 70’s to 80’s who were culturally socialized differently from today’s modern parent. I am 53years old and a product of this mode of parenting which did not openly express its emotions. They kept their emotions under a tight lid and simple expressions like “I love you” let alone a hug did not exist. My father has never openly expressed love or hugged any of us and now that he is 80 it’s doubtful that he will. He however exposes it covertly through his deeds/actions. Women however are more flexible and mother made a deliberate effort to learn/change and now hugs all her loved ones. Unbelievably despite this earlier lack of expression they were God fearing incredibly responsible, caring and loving parents. We never lacked anything, they were always present for the family and they sent us to the best educational institutions in Kenya and the world.
This caring and love has extended to their grandchildren. An example in point was when our University student son had a motor a non-injury motor accident in Prince Edward Island, Canada last year. We talked to both our son and daughter via telephone after the event and they confirmed that he was fine apart from the vehicle which was written off. Upon informing mother she did not appear altogether satisfied with this explanation. Thereafter on her own volition she secretly travelled to Canada; visited them for a week and made the gracious step of purchasing a replacement vehicle for him. To us this enormous sacrifice of time and resources was a tremendous act of love. We concur with psychoanalyst and author Dr. Scott .M. Peck when he states that love is not a “feeling” but a “continuous act of caring even during times when loving feelings have ebbed or faded”.
My purpose of writing this mail is to discount the notion that some of the people who do not openly or visibly display emotion are unloving. They just didn’t know anything better as regards overt expressions yet they can be very loving and when one is amongst them it is almost palpable. It is like one can actually feel it and after such an experience one feels highly energized and elated with positive feelings of love. God Bless.
DAUDI MWENDA. P.O.BOX 24943-00502 NAIROBI. CELL: 0722 154 722.
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November 1, 2010 at 11:51 am
Hey Pastor S, Thanks for the project dad series. It has been a blessing and just an insight of how much i take my dad for granted for being an awesome dad he has and yet by just reading the blog of how people are hurting was a being lesson for me. Today,the persons we are (me&my 3 sisters) we owe it to my dad,educating us as girl child despite the many discouragements from pple that he was just wasting his money,uncomfortable it was 4 him to talk about sex,men etc he still did nway. My advise to all dads,pliz pliz walk the journey of life with your children because you det who they will be in future with the help of God.
God Bless you All
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December 2, 2010 at 4:31 pm
please,please send me the teachings about the woman in me or all the teachings of may 2010.
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