Let It Go!
Minor Hurts
Annoyances – those things that irritate us
Slights – when someone snub you, mostly unintentionally
Disappointments – when people don’t do what we expect them to do for us
Get over it! Learn to develop a thick skin!
Major Hurts
Disloyalty – when someone I trust doesn’t reciprocate that trust
Betrayal – when someone I trust goes behind my back to harm me
Brutality – when someone violently assaults me and causes me harm
Genesis 45:1-15 Let It Go!
Why Let It G0?
1. God asks us to do it – 2Corinthians 2:11
2. We leave room for – Romans 12:19
3. We close the door – Matthew 18:21
Three things that forgiveness is not…
Forgiving is not forgetting
Forgiving is not excusing
Forgiving is not tolerance
Closing The Door…
1. Acknowledge The Pain
2. Re-frame The Pain
3. Choose To Let Go
4. Seek Reconciliation
PRAYER FOR THE WEEK
Dear heavenly Father, I thank You for the riches of Your kindness, forbearance, and patience, knowing that Your kindness has led me to repentance (Rom.2:4). I confess that I have not extended that same patience and kindness toward others who have offended me, but instead I have harbored bitterness and resentment. I pray that during this time of self-examination You would bring to mind all those people that I have not forgiven in order that I may do so (Matt.18:35). I also pray that if I have offended others You would bring to mind all those people from whom I need to seek forgiveness and the extent to which I need to seek it (Matt.5:23-4). I ask this in the precious name of Jesus. AMEN.
Blog.Mavuno 
January 31, 2010 at 2:58 pm
Hey Pastor M,
Today’s message was really powerful! This entire series is just wow wow wow! I have been skeptical about Mavuno, even though I have to this church for more than a year. But you know what God spoke to me today and reminded me of the portion of scripture- you shall know them by their fruits! Sermons at Mavuno are on pertinent issues, real issues…and they are life transforming, if we choose to partner with God in what he desires to do in our lives.
As I sat in church I was huko scratching my head and thinking of who I can play victim to, who shall I forgive…hmmm, surely, people have wronged me…then you spoke of us also being the ones to ask for forgiveness, and I tell you, I have quite a list! One friend is far, and I have just sent her an email asking for forgiveness. I shall meet the rest in the course of the week. Truly, it frees someone..I was wallowing in guilt, but that act of asking for forgiveness, even before I know her response, that act has set me free. I truly testify that he who the son has set free is free indeed.
So I am seated here thinking, if the entire congregation of Mavuno, forgave and asked for forgiveness, wouldnt this city be a much better place to live in? May our light as Mavuno so shine in the darkness, and may those around us see it and praise and glorify our God in heaven.
Oh, and by the way, I have meant to ask you, why dont you wear your wedding band? Kanji also doesnt… And generally this is something that bugs me about married men. Honestly, a wedding band alerts all and sundry that this man is married! I dont want to wish the vibe of a married man in ignorance…help! Arent married people supposed to have their wedding bands on at all times? i say people for both men and women.
Ok, be blessed Pastor M. You are an annointed man of God!
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January 31, 2010 at 4:24 pm
I’m not eloquent, I’m not very good at sharing my testimony, but I can confirm that God has spoken to me, again!
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January 31, 2010 at 4:49 pm
Hi Pastor M, I have had mixed feelings about the Jan series. U nailed it for me 2day. Got married 5years ago but got separated after 1year due to my husband’s infidelity with a woman who was in our wedding party. After the separation, he moved in with her and they now have a child. I got saved after that n I have lived a pure life with lots of setbacks but I have stayed the course. The woman in question comes to Mavuno and I meet with her all the time. Sometimes my husband even drops her in church. Recently, I have felt a need to move on, but how do I when my husband refuses to discuss a divorce? I have learnt many things about marriage and I know enough not to get into an adulterous rship myself but wat do I do? I am in my thirties, too young to live alone 4eva coz of peoples selfishness.I feel angry wen she waltzes into church looking all Holy, lifting her hands in worship while she continues her adulterous ‘come we stay arrangement’ with my husband.There is no prayer for marriages that I havent been part of, so it came as a surprise 2day when U prayed 4 marriages and said ‘It doesnt matter who he’s with right now’……I am bitter. I have been asked out by some1 else and when I told my friends last week, they gathered to fast for me…….I took it as a joke but they were dead serious coz they say I have come too far to give up now………That woman continues to mock me with her friends who also come to Mavuno(Mavuno has transformed my life and I have no intention of leaving), they sneer when I pass and speak in low tones. How do I get past the bitterness, How do I forgive a man who messed up my life (I am raising our son alone), How do I 4give a woman who mocks God every sunday yet continues to walk free with a smirk on her face every time I see her just to show me I am nothing? She is yellow yellow and with great hips to boot, shes in her twenties-next to her, I have no chance with my husband……..I am bitter coz we all act so holy yet in our midst are Jezebels who are breaking people’s homes and messing up the future of children because they want an easy life. My husband is well off and continues to flourish while I wallow in poverty for doing the right thing (He left me without a job-got one though)……It hurts. I question God all the time, but He is God and at the end of it all, He will do whatever He wants. I want to go to heaven, the sermon put a KNOT in my heart. I am torn btw doing the right thing and living. I aint living…….Do U have an answer for me, am I justified to be bitter? I am happier now. I havent forgot. I have tried to forgive but wen I see her, it all rushes back…….Its too much 4 me.
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January 31, 2010 at 8:59 pm
As I write am back to church after 7 years.
Having been brought up by “GOD fearing Parents” who had issues infidelity, wife battering, Children battering etc.I felt I never want to come close to their “GOD”. We are six siblings.
These are some of the issues that have been my life
• My mother would be beaten and then my father would stand in an Anglican church proclaim God and preach to people. She is asthmatic and diabetic and has always complained about her husband to us. Though he stopped beating her after I stood up to him and told him ill beat him up instead. The wounds and bitterness in my soul have never been healed. I longed for the day they would divorce and stopped pretending.
• My three brothers would be beaten and thrown out. One developed suicidal tendencies and I rescued him twice hanging from a tree. He is now on his second marriage which he doesn’t take care of. The other one suffered Psychiatric depression. The other one doesn’t work but is always looking for friends who have money to associate with. He corns everyone money.
• My two sisters are divorced. Two of my first born sister’s children are living in my fathers home as she slaves in America….and not seen them in 12 years. On Thursday 28th January the boy ran away from home. Our second born sister is pseudo religious. Having been through a psychiatric depression.
• I never seem to make progress in anything…has never been in a relationship am 30 years old Ive a college degree .I move from married man to married man just looking for appreciation. I don’t sleep with the same Man more than 3 months I never ask them for money….but sleep with them. I can’t stand disciplining me or anyone else I wet my bed if I am faced with a violent scene I can’t fight for anything. Am numb in pain …. I have I’ve ulcers and I’m going for counseling because I don’t sleep most of the nights. Where do I start so that I can live a normal life? Am ready to find my own “GOD” although every day I listen to you am amazed at how you touch all those problems I’ve been through. But as soon as I leave someone is calling me for “SEX” and I have it and in the evening am masturbation mode…..
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January 31, 2010 at 9:06 pm
ok am hoping a miracle can happen so that am normal
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January 31, 2010 at 9:19 pm
am hopefull
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February 1, 2010 at 10:14 am
pastor m, you honestly just preached to me.
thank God for you, is it possible to talk to someone in church to just help me in the healing and forgiving process
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February 1, 2010 at 11:00 am
hi pastor m,the message was cool and i thought you were talking to me,
am confused what to do who to blame because everything is not going as per my wish though i trust in God,have been in a relationship for about 7 years and the guy just disappointing me the time i was needing him very much because i was pregnant i was stressed up and know am sick am HIV positive i just don’t know were to go and whom to turn to.i feel like i was bet raid i just ask my self were was GOD to protect me,why me to get that disease.but the way you preached i was so blessed and am trying to forget all this and move on with my life,i know is not easy but am praying for your prayers to help me.am seeing another person but he lives in London and is coming to visit me next month i don’t what to loss this man, and i don’t know how to tell him about my statues am confused because he will live me.pastor m i need serious prayers because i what to be free.God bless you and your family a lot for being supportive in prayers
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February 1, 2010 at 11:04 am
Hi pasy,my case z complicatd my ex usd me 2 solve hs financial proboz n mde me fal 4 hm thn i found out he ws doggin me n t broke ma heart so i decided 2 lay low thn aftr smtym he appears n ma lyf again n am nt mad wit hm aktualy i always fnd maslf calin hm jst 2 b sua hes ok thn again i promise maslf nt 2 cal hm thn i cal hm.i dnt kw wat 2 do nymre…
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February 1, 2010 at 12:20 pm
My heart breaks when I read the comments above. I will be praying for you both. I know, I know, I know that I know, that God is your Father and that He will look out for you. The Bible says that He rejoices over you with singing. He has a plan, He will bring it to pass. And as Pastor M said jana, vengeance is His. He will fight this battles for you! I am praying for you both – Bitter and Confused and Want to change prostitute. I will join those who are praying tirelessly for you until you see God’s Hand in your situations.
With you in prayer, Chosen
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February 1, 2010 at 1:28 pm
@ Bitter & Confused and @ want to change prostitute please send me an email (check Pastor M’s Blog)
Baraka Tele!
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February 1, 2010 at 1:32 pm
“want to change prostitute ways” – i have just read your life story in tears.
i thot i had issues in life, but it feels like mine are juz lightweight.
i know God can deliver you – have the determination to quit your prostitute ways – our God is able.
you can make make it, get into prayer and occupy ya mind with positive things.
I pray that God delivers you.
juz hang in there and keep the trust.
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February 1, 2010 at 1:43 pm
pastor M, thanks so much for your continued eye-opening messages. may God bls you so much.
i have had marriage issues – now separated completely for 2 yrs after been in a marriage for 13 yrs.
i know i have been very bitter about my ex and about the whole thing. i know i have had to go thr’ alot.
i am now going thr’ divorce. the whole hing has left a bitterness in my life.
there were days i would think of committing suicide – feeling that i was a total failure in life.God has however been giving me the strength to keep going.
i have remained faithfully single for the 2 yrs and feel this is the best for me – at least for now.
your message was so strong for me and gave me the urge to forgive completely and move on.
it’s amazing how we go thr’ so much in life – sometimes one wonders what they did wrong!!!
i am so pysched on forgiving and getting closer to God.
i know i need to give myself more to the work of God.
i have gone thr’ so much that i feel that i need to help people in the future who have had life breaking issues like mine.
pls, pray with me.
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February 1, 2010 at 2:08 pm
Dear Bitter and confused.
I cannot claim to know how you feel but I feel badly already knowing what you had to go thru every now and then. It hurts so deep but God can heal your wounds.The healing process begins by acknowledging that you cant do it by yourself and do not even have the power to do it but God does.Its trusting God to take you step by step. I applaud you being faithful inspite of your situation.Keep looking upto God and he will give you the peace that surpasses all understanding.Thats a promise. In due time he will lift you up.Stay the course and know that I have said a prayer for you and it will be well.
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February 1, 2010 at 2:42 pm
Dear Want to change Prostitute.
You have endured alot of pain and hardship since you were very young.The issues you have described are not your own.Its neither your fault that you found yourself in the position you are now or your family.What you have described are family curses running through generations and these curses need to be broken. All sexual disorders including infidelity,divorce, repeated sexual addictions are caused by sexual soul ties that you need to renouce through deliverance.Deliverance is a prayer done by yourself with the help of spirit led counceller where you acknowledge all these sins and then renounce them.God desires that we live in freedom as Christians.I have gone thru deliverance myself and I know that it works.
Please read a book by Niel. T.Anderson, the “Bondage Breaker”.It will set you free. Remember freedom begins the moment you accept Chirst as your Lord and Saviour. I leave you with the following scriptures.Please read meditate and pray them aloud and you will begin to experience freedom all by yourself. Remember we are saved by Faith and if you have Faith in your heart the word we speak become alive and active in you. Freedom in Chirst- Isaiah 48.10, Healing for your spirit Isaiah 53.5,Psalms 107, Joel 2.25,Gods perfect plan concerning your life Psalms 27.4, Collosians 117,Out of reach by Satan,Psalms 125, Numbers 23.23 and Isaiah 54.17.
Remember that God loves you so much and he desires that you be free to enjoy your new life in Christ. I speak healing into your life and I declare a wall of fire around you. May the angels keep watch over you and may all plans schemes and devices of the enemy be broken in Jesus name.I cover you now with the blood of Jesus and seal you with the anointing of the Holy Spirit. Be encouraged for the Lord is with you. I will continue to pray for you.
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February 1, 2010 at 3:54 pm
Did you know that you are in a battle? Did you know that the enemy sinned against you only to bring you into a lifestyle of sin and shame? The devil messed you up to MESS YOU UP! He brought pain and suffering through sinful acts and sometimes generational curses from the sins of your father or mother. The devil entered your life in some manner only to keep you in the dark and block you from reaching your full potential in Christ. This is where the devil really is. He is not attacking your money and finances, he is attacking your soul and mind! You see, the devil has planned strategic warfare against you. He has probed your life to find the door that you leave cracked open and he keeps entering in through that door. The enemy desires to destroy you, your family, and all that resembles goodness. This is his job and he is very good at it.
When sin entered into your life in the form of some traumatic act and it led you into a lifestyle struggle, it was on purpose! The devil knew that if he caused you to be abandoned by your parents, raped, molested, abused, etc., there would be a lifestyle struggle introduced to you and it would cause you to fall again and again. He knew that through these acts, he could get you addicted to porn, masturbation, drugs, alcohol, same sex relations, etc. He knew that if you wore shame as a garment, you would be totally ineffective for God and he can claim the victory over your life. The devil is a DEVIL and as long as we are bound by his efforts, we are lost.
But remember, THIS IS A FIGHT! God knows everything that you have been through and he knows all that the devil is doing. Yet, God doesn’t see it like the enemy sees it. When you were violated by sin, God saw you suiting up! When that sin was perpetrated on you, God saw you drawing black lines under your eyes. When the devil caused that person to plant that unrighteousness in you, God saw you putting on your fatigue and loading your weapon! In other words, what the enemy thought would destroy you is the very thing he should fear. When the enemy saw you defeated, God saw you in training and while in the natural, it may have looked like you were down, in the spirit realm, you became a warrior. This means that you must fight!
God gives us free will and dominion to govern ourselves in the earth, and that is a good thing. But there are downsides to this as well. People have the power to hurt others in the life and that’s very unfortunate. But always remember this, what the devil means for evil, God can turn around and use. Though it may have been painful to endure, it may be necessary for the next group to see your deliverance as their own. And even deeper than that, your victory could persuade the next violator to come to his or her senses before they ever commit the violation on another. Understand this, you are in a unique position when the enemy targets you. When you have gone through and gotten the scars as well as the deliverance, you can prepare others for the battle and teach God’s plan for their deliverance as well. The words of your testimony become your weapon of warfare, and at that point, God drops you behind enemy lines so that you can rescue others from the grips of the enemy.
But your deliverance is key! Without it, you are not qualified for the rescue mission. You must overcome what the devil did to you and you must walk in victory to teach others. This requires some lifestyle checks and balances to keep in this mode and you must be careful who you listen to, who you befriend, where you go and what you allow in your life. These are battles none of us asked for, but because we have been victimized by the free will of others, we have to be watchful and careful of what enters us. When you have gone through these things, the devil is always looking to trigger that side of you and get you back like you were once you have been victorious over it. But you have to keep fighting and walking in victory. This qualifies you to go behind enemy lines and represent the true deliverance of God and how you can live a life, exemplifying the true power of God to heal and deliver. Sure, it’s a battle and you must fight continually. I know you may feel that it’s not fair that you have to struggle and fight against these things, but it’s a honor to fight on the winning side and even more honorable to rescue others that are prisoners behind enemy lines. In 2010, the fight will get intense and you will get tired. You will get discouraged and weary at times, but remember this, if you desire true healing and deliverance, then you must keep fighting. No matter how many hits you take, just know that the war is won and victory is yours, God is just waiting for you to fall in and line up with it!
Hebrews 11:32 ¶ And what shall I more say? for the time would fail me to tell of Gedeon, and of Barak, and of Samson, and of Jephthae; of David also, and Samuel, and of the prophets:Who through faith subdued kingdoms, wrought righteousness, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions,Quenched the violence of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, out of weakness were made strong, waxed valiant in fight, turned to flight the armies of the aliens.
Jude 24 Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy
2Corinthians 10:4 (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;)
1Corinthians 9:26 I therefore so run, not as uncertainly; so fight I, not as one that beateth the air: But I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway.
Have a blessed time.
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February 1, 2010 at 4:54 pm
Pastor M,
Yaani I just donno what to say. May God bless you sana sana. You are being used of God to make a huge change in our lives!! Waah. My friend and I were talking abt Joseph and she said if it were her she wd have thrown the siblings in a container and set it on fire…ouch!! Surely If not for the forgiveness we have received!! I loved what you said abt He who has been forgiven much loves much. Those who got to know Christ kitambo find it hard to see what someone else who got saved juzi is going thru… May God help us all to feel the pain of what those who have not found the light yet feel!! May we in mavuno change the perception that the world has about Christians!!
God bless you all!!!
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February 1, 2010 at 5:12 pm
Hey!am a new member n really enjoyed the sermon on sunday.love the down to earth practical teachings that help us become better Christians and better people.Truly refreshing and am planning to make Mavuno my permanent church.Thanx!
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February 1, 2010 at 6:11 pm
@want to change prostitute – i’ve read ur “story” and felt such emotion for you. Let me encourage you – Surrender your life to God and trust in Him only and these desires of your heart will surely be realized. Remember and claim God’s promise to you in Jer 29:11 (He knows the plans He has for you, plans for GOOD and NOT for evil). We are all sinners and fallen short of the glory of God BUT the saving precious love of Jesus is all we need – lay down your burdens, worries and life at the cross of Jesus. Pick up His yoke and follow Him. I have not gone through such experiences as yours but I have also had a difficult childhood (with my parents marriage, etc) and seen the effects this had on my siblings and on myself. BUT, I have a powerful testimony of how much my life has changed! since giving my life over to God. He is able. Just surrender all to Him and trust Him.
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February 1, 2010 at 6:21 pm
sunday service was amazing….
it was my second visit to mavuno in a row.
i found something i was looking for since my campus days when i used to attend SALT every thursday……. solid life transforming word of God.
i cant miss any sunday.
I am trying to be reconcilled to God again after very shaky last 2 years.
I think Mavuno is the place for me.
I thank God for letting me dicover Mavuno.
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February 1, 2010 at 7:04 pm
Hi
@want to change prostitute – I am so sorry for what you have gone through in your life, you are too young to be experiencing all these things. I am no expert but I believe that you need deliverance. Youcan get alot of help from Mavuno’s counselling team more so for you and eventually for the whole family. Most of the issues you are going through have come to your life as doorways have been opened for the enemy hence deliverance would be your best option. this will take alot of prayer and may not happen overnight but will be a start. May God be with you and Bless you. He knows your name and will come through for you.
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February 1, 2010 at 11:13 pm
i had been perpetually sinning and God decided to show me my sins practically last sunday. i came to church after practically and disobediently sinning against God, i have been slowly but surely distroying myself and didnt know the extend i had gone untill God decided to let me be in control of my faculties and i was wondering why. not untill i came to church and listened to pastor M did i realize God wanted to show me my sin. i must repent here and say that though pastor M preached, i heard God talking with me through the service. i hardly break down but i did break down and confessed my sins. i realize god loves me so much that he still went out HIs way to come minister to me persomnally and more so give me another chance. am so happy i came for the service and i must say i feel great now. i wanted to fast for the whole week for my sinful self but over time i have been so undisciplined till its hard to fast. i pray God to continue showing me mercy and to continue using you pastors to bring the lost like me back to fold. thank you and nice week
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February 2, 2010 at 12:26 am
I sat there and I thought to myself ” How does he know all these things about me? Who’s he been talking to?”
That’s how profound and deep Sunday’s Sermon was to me. You started the Extreme Makeover Series and i thought…umm. Every Sunday you start by ‘confessing’ something in your own life and I love that breaks the highly held myth that Pastors are beyond reproach and humanity.
I sat and I listened and with tears in my eyes chose to FORGIVE and LET GO AND GOD.
Thank You for these truths that are being portrayed in this Sermon Series. I can attest and confess that truly GOD needed US to hear this message and HE will truly reveal HIMSELF to US in the end.
Reading other posts and comments I feel humbled and overwhelmed to know that we all have issues and wounds that we’ve carried along. And to all my Brothers and Sisters who’ve shared…remember GOD WILL NEVER LEAVE NOR FORSAKE US.
GOD Bless You…Pastor Muriithi. GOD BLESS YOU.
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February 2, 2010 at 8:03 am
Hi,
Yani this last service u were talking to me Pastor M. When u spoke of your Maths teacher i remembered my History teacher who always had it in for me yet i never did anything wrong. Every time i think of that woman all the emotions from 9 years ago come back n i always say that if she was ever on fire n i was next to her i’d let her burn. How do i forgive someone who hated me for nothing. I listened to u saying that because u failed in Maths u did Biochemistry and met ur lovely wife. Unlike you i don’t see anything positive out of my history teacher hating me. How do i let it go. There are so many people who continue to hurt me even though i forgive them. They take advantage of the fact that i let it go and am tired of letting go if all it gets me is more pain. How is it possible for a normal human being to continuously hurt another without a care in the world. How many times do i need to forgive for people to style up. Am only human and there is only so much i can take. Am tired of being the goody 2 shoe.
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February 2, 2010 at 10:47 am
My heart goes out to bitter and confused. I cannot start to imagine the amount of hurt you feel each time you see the lady living with your husband in church. I greatly admire your determination to continue coming to mavuno and for trying to live your life right inspite of all the set backs. Sometimes life looks unfair because the people who don’t seem to deserve success are the ones who get it. But I would want to encourage you to keep trusting and living for God. He will win this battle for you. You are worth and God will do great and amazing things in your life. Far above what you can even imagine. I am praying for you. God bless.
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February 2, 2010 at 11:37 am
@bitter and confused. I hear you! I have been through what you are going through. I would urge you to read Hannah story in 1st Samuel Chapter 1and 2. Keep praying and crying out to God, stay connected no matter what and fix your eyes on the Lord! He will remember you like he did Hannah and He will avenge for you.God bless you my sister.
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February 2, 2010 at 2:04 pm
@ bitterness
god changes what was intended 4 bad to be a blessing. here is my story hope u can connect with it n get encouragement.
i was only eighteen in 2006, a born again christian, a week after i got a full scholarship to the university when my sponsors insisted on a full health test. i was very sure that i was okay since i had protected sex only once in my lyf with my two three years boyfriend. this is when i lost my virginity. they took some blood tests n it turned that i was HIV positive. mind u that this test was done publicly by medic students who later went telling everybody about my status. it was a real bitter taste. i thank god i can give the testimony on this blog. the worst part was when my sponsors decided that i should only take a certificate course since i was just lyk dead anyway. i had to give this unpleasant news to my mum n my dad who had told everyone that i was joining uni. (by the way dad developed a drinking habit n died after some months due to this) my friends went to uni n i was left all alone with no hopes n no dreams at all. when i told my good boyfriend, he really insulted me n called m all sort of names including prostitute.
i then joined a college in nairobi to study disaster management which was completely out of my wish but my sponsors’. it wasnt working. i used to walk in all corners of nairobi lyk a crazy woman. to my new friends in nairobi, i was the best but deep inside m, i was hurting n dying slowly. i then changed to bridging mathematics which i had failed tho’ my best subject in high school. while doing maths, i met a friend who led m back to my god n helped m forgive n release all this people that i was carrying in my lyf. he invited m to mavuno n wao! my lyf has never been the same again. he is believes in healing n keeps on telling m that i am healed. i believe tho’ still afraid of VCT. he is my fiancee n i thank god for where he has taken m from. if not for my boyfriend, i would not have met my future husband, i would not have come to mavuno where my lyf got a purpose, n my lyf would have been gone n so gone.
by the way god has been so faithfull. i finished my diploma in buss. n am in first job, earning enough. i glorify my god. i am free from any burdens. since i chose to forgive, let go n let god.
praying for you all that god will change all your painfull situations to blessings just lyk johna in the bible.
bless u
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February 2, 2010 at 7:28 pm
i got issues when it comes to people not keeping their promises and i really form enemies that easily cos most people are not able to keep promises. i feel betrayed when i cant feel like people are serious about promises and find it hard to forgive such incidences. How can i let go and forgive them cos they really weigh me down?
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February 2, 2010 at 7:56 pm
Let the redeemed the of the Lord say so…. Probably i need to study more on FORGIVENES. I have a story that no one knows about. I was sexually molested by a woman who was a family friend when i was 12 when my mum was away in the name of a gurdian, that defined my sexual life, couldnt stop masturbating until now, had an absent dad n as a result have gotten hurt by many men searching for approval and love, have done 5 abortions but i stand today not guilty becouse have been Forgiven. I gave my life to christ in december 2008 and since then have not turned back, broke up with my ex boyfriend when i got saved becouse i couldnt give in 2 his sexual demands as a result he hates mavuno and christianity he calls me a hypocrate, puts me down through his words whenever he talks to me, the other day he heard pastor M on capital fm and he agreed with what the dj said that christians are judgmental ….may be havent been a good example to him, no matter how many times i apologize to him he has never forgiven me for hurting him also coz i did, i always pray that God will convict him, have never been able to quit masturbation but today by the power of the blood of Jesus am getting delivered and i will be FREE
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February 3, 2010 at 9:05 am
Hiya Team Mavuno,
It’s great to see sermon summaries on the blog this year, please keep it up! It’s such a great help to prepare for lg discussions & for people who don’t come to Mavuno or may have missed the service. Thanks very much for the initiative and work that’s put into this. God bless your service in His house.
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February 3, 2010 at 9:41 am
@Chosen
am so with you.
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February 3, 2010 at 11:52 am
After reading the comments from this weeks sermon – Pastor M – I’m praying for you & the pastoral team that the Lord will continue to provide you with the wisdom, capacity and compassion to facilitate healing as we continue with the Makeover series – there is a need.
@ Bitter & Confused – I’m sorry for what your husband has done to you – don’t be troubled when you see them prosper – like Pastor M said leave it to God – its not a cliche – I don’t have a solution for you dear. However with respect to your husbands mistress (as you say) salvation is between you and the Lord – no matter how ‘holy’ someone looks in church God looks at the heart of a person and sees the truth – don’t doubt that for one second. So when they sneer at you or whatever don’t give it the time of day – don’t let them take your peace – the Bible says there is nothing done in the dark that will not be known – Mavuno isn’t a church where you get noticed on appearances – its about authentic Christianity – your fruits – so keep your chin up. The Lord will turn your situation around.
@Want to Change Prostitute – my heart goes out to you for what you experienced as a child – with your siblings – I have learned that to forgive your parents is to give yourself a chance at a healing and a normal life in Christ Jesus. As a man I apologize for what men are doing to you. I pray that the Lord will open a window in your situation that will lead to a change in your life. As you continue to go for counseling I encourage you to plug into Mizizi or a life group – you need friends around you – good friends to walk with you. You weren’t created to be abused and there is no fulfillment in living for physical desires alone – it will not fill the hunger in your heart. By speaking out your taking a step in the right direction the next is to say NO when they call.
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February 3, 2010 at 12:15 pm
Listening to the sermon on sunday- i could think of a few close people who needed to hear it. I quickly reflected through my life to see if there was anyone i needed to forgive. none. anyone who needs to forgive me. im usually pretty good at admitting i am wrong -so none. my conscience was clear. till monday morning when i got a 3 page email from someone who even after apologising several times for a relationship not working out has been extremely hurt and wounded by my decision to walk away from the relationship.. Its not easy to hear that you are the reason someones back to drinking, not coping, getting counselling or is extrememly bitter. What do you do? You’ve apologised, youve prayed for the situation, youve moved on. What do you do when someones so hurt and angry at you? and sorry just doenst count….
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February 3, 2010 at 12:35 pm
want to change prostitute…i hope you know that the Lord delights in you everytime he sees you..you are his precious daughter..do not let the burden of sin or the lies of the evil one make you feel like you cannot receive forgiveness..he already died for your sins…accept his forgiveness and take the steps to freedom..you are already free..im praying for you..may God give you the daily strength to walk through your struggles every day!..you are in the right place…speak to church leader im sure they will guide you to a counsellor who can walk you throught the process of deliverance.
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February 3, 2010 at 1:44 pm
Hi, I started attending Mavuno on January 17th and since that Sunday, I have not missed and I hope that I will be able to maintain and make Mavuno my church.
I am married and on 2nd year now. Have had issues in my life…..for sometime I could not even understand what my purpose is in life. For those 3 sundays that I have been to church, God has been bringing messages that are an exact picture of my life…..I know that Gods blessings come at their right time and at one point, I felt like am a failure.
On sunday I trusted God for restoration of my marriage…….for sure, mine was on the verge but today-I see a big change. Prayers do work and marriages can be restored by our Father in Heaven…..I hope that my husband will join me soon and agree to come to church.
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February 3, 2010 at 2:44 pm
On the EXTREME Make Over Series,
I have been hurt by spiritual leaders, family etc.
I have suffered rejection, emotional brutality, had someone i trusted let me down etc. etc. the amazing thing is: this is when i grew the most spiritually. I have been misunderstood all my life, I’ve suffered depression & even been suicidal a few times due to the performance trap lie.
May i add that this is very tricky since whether we like it or not, our lives are dictated to us by society in MANY ways e.g, if you’re a divorcee, you’re not working, you can’t seem to get a mate etc. Naturally, the society sees you a certain way.
I think our greatest enemy is not even us or the devil but the society and its perception on various issues.
So what the Bible says is all nice & dandy but without having an outlet to display your worth, it gets too tricky.
When you live for success, the performance trap really gets you. But we all live to be better tomorrow. I always make fun that i don’t wake up every morning bcoz Christ died for me but for a higher calling-whatever that may be.
Through the worst, i know that i am stronger now & i know what is most important now-happiness, joy, peace, true friendships- the priceless things money can’t buy & that are not easy to come by & i know who i am & how precious life is-can’t afford any mistakes not in career or relationships or decisions etc, every moment counts.
I am really enjoying the series. God bless you so much
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February 4, 2010 at 9:31 am
My heart Goes out to all those who are hurting.
A while back my ex out of the blue left me for a friend, that hurt and I felt so much betrayal and bitterness.
I did my fair share of crying and feeling sorry for myself and then as I prayed and still told God that I would praise no matter what happened in my life a transformation begun in me. In short there are many good books you can read to make you feel better or listen to particular messages from particular preachers but the bottom line transforming thing was realizing and understanding that GOD LOVES ME. I believe that unfortunately most Christians think that God loves them but they do not really understand or have not experienced GODS love. This is because our ideas of love has been contaminated because most people who have been supposed to love us have instead hurt us and totally distorted our mental and emotional perception of love.
I pray that you will come to a realization that GOD LOVES YOU.
“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” Psalm 56:8
God will not always protect you from people who will hurt you but KNOWLEDEGE of His love for you will sustain you and motivate you to not be their victim. Also unforgiven and bitterness is like drinking poison and expecting someone else to die.
When I meet my ex and her new beau they are confused because I’m so nice to them and I never act up. They have nothing but good things to say about me and I feel no ill will towards them. Why? Coz i know that GOD has a plan and purpose of my life bigger than me or a failed relationship. You are too important and great to be defined by a man or woman who did not appreciate you. You were born to change history and talk to kings of nations.
Lastly you have to start speaking God’s truth to your emotions rather than letting yourself speak to your emotions. U are in a constant conversation with yourself and yourself does nothing but keep reminding you of your hurt and in the process stokes up bitterness. The best example of this is david in Psalm 42. If you are hurting I recommend reading psalm 42 and psalm 73 everyday especially when you are feeling bitter. When i was going through my turmoils I read those everyday and they transformed me as they became a part of me. Psalm 73:26 26 “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. ”
To all those hurting remember You are awesome, GOD loves you and Knows you by name, He know the number of hairs on your body and even though you are going through tough times KNOWLEDGE of His love can sustain you, Be encouraged and memorize psalms 42 and 73.
Barikiwa Pastor M
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February 4, 2010 at 9:37 am
This is a poem I cam across and it fits in to the all make over theme of this month. It reflects how God is a sort of builder and we are the projet be blessed.
When God wants to drill a man,
And thrill a man,
And skill a man
When God wants to mold a man
To play the noblest part;
When He yearns with all His heart
To create so great and bold a man
That all the world shall be amazed,
Watch His methods, watch His ways!
How He ruthlessly perfects
Whom He royally elects!
How He hammers him and hurts him,
And with mighty blows converts him
Into trial shapes of clay which
Only God understands;
While his tortured heart is crying
And he lifts beseeching hands!
How He bends but never breaks
When his good He undertakes;
How He uses whom He chooses,
And which every purpose fuses him;
By every act induces him
To try His splendor out-
God knows what He’s about.
-Author Unknown
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February 4, 2010 at 11:45 am
@bitter and confused and
@want to change prostitute
I am sooo sorry for what you have been and are going through…for the tough experiences, the pain, the hurt. Even wishing that I could shield you from the hurt, the pain of the past & present circumstances would never be enough. I have learnt that only God can check in to truly heal those wounds.
As i read your blog post, i so got why we share on this blog.
As we type what is there for us, coming as we are, sometimes wondering how it will be heard/received out there…it speaks to someone. Three things happened for me…
1) Though i will never know what it has been for you, I so felt the pain you are and have been going through
2) your sharing had me reflect on my own situations with pain and to realise that healing has come for those painful and hurtful situations i have been through and had me see the power of prayer. For me, it has come in the way of song, in the way of an unexpected smses or emails to just touch the place i am at, they’ve come in a conversation, from overhearing something said, from stuff said on TV programmes (Sermons, unless on TV, were not my thing – i had stopped going to church a very very long time ago)…So i have learnt that God will use anything to reach us. I still struggle with being in community but I know He will heal that wound too.
3) I was really touched too by P.K.’s post. There was something about his apology and his standing in the gap for menfolk that touched me. I cannot say why it did but it felt like i heaved a sigh of relief; like i have been waiting for someone to do what he did.
@ P.K. thank you.
thank you for seeing that this is not the way it should go.
thank you for being one of the few men who stand up and state as much. i pray that God raises up so many more like you so that our children donot ever have to go through what ‘want to change prostitute’ and her family & ‘bitter & confused’ have gone through.
just thank you.
You stated those words with no idea that God would use them to reach someone else too and begin the healing of an old old wound even though i donot know how or what brought it on.
This morning i remembered the sermon from sunday…acknowledge the pain then reframe the pain.
i so clearly saw how God has, over time, delivered me from situations (sometimes repeated) regarding less-than-wholesome relationships i had allowed myself to get into. I could see that i allowed the deep loneliness and need to belong compromise my decisions/my actions. I had stopped really seeking God, went by my way/instinct hence ended up in messed-up-going-nowhere relationships that were everything but after God’s own heart.
Though it may not look like it, at this time, each one of you has a powerful ministry. You can be used of God to reach people who have been through what you are and have been going through. I know there are no simple solutions and i know that sometimes i have wished that there was a pill i could swallow to ease the pain. But this side of that particular valley i can say i am a victor and i find that i have a compassion and an intuition for the things people go/have gone through. Sharing from where i have been, from what i have been through i have been a source of solace for people going through all manner of situations, related to what i’ve been through and not.
So the long and short of this is that as you take on the various suggestions made by our fellow bloggers, keep praying. I am praying with and for you that our Father will place a hedge of protection around you…that you will feel His love encompass you and believe what He says about you…that you are precious; you are worthy of love; that you are His.
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February 4, 2010 at 2:00 pm
I visited the blog to pose a problem. After reading ‘bitterness’ and ‘want to change’ i dont have issues! Therefore Pator M i shall join you & your team in prayer, i shall answer the call to stand in the gap.
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February 5, 2010 at 12:53 am
Pastor,
Wow, I just forgave a man who wronged me almost 15 years ago, and left me three months pregnant. I have listened to your sermons, listened and prayed too, and I decided to obey God’s message through you. I wrote the man an e-mail which he has not responded to, but I have done my part. I forgave him. I know look back at my 14.5 years old son and marvel and what I have and what he (the man ), does not have, what I am blessed with and what he misses out on, and I have no regrets at all. I thought I had forgiven him, but now I realised I had lied to myself that I had forgiven him, Today, I really did gorgive him. I believe there are good men out there, and that my Mr. God-chiselled-broken-sand papered-and fixed -Prince, ordained by God shall find me one day. On the same note Pastor, I cant wait for my son to come to Mavuno and be blessed. MAVUNO, watu wanajuvunia , kuwa MAVUNONITES! My story is a blessing to me, always will be. God bless you and team for all the good works you do in teaching and reproving us, sharpenning and moulding us.
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February 5, 2010 at 9:13 am
Ei Pastor M, what a vivid description…River bitterness
For some reason, this last sermon has been on my mind all week (as it should be).
I was just blown away…all those times I have read, heard, sang about Joseph & his Technicolor coat! Not once was there anything there for me about forgiveness in the way you presented it in your sermon. Amazing! Thank you
Last night, at life group, as we discussed the sermon, we talked about Joseph and the bit about bitterness crept up. We recalled the description as a river. So this morning, as I woke up this morning, I had a vivid visual (for want of a better word). It was about the heading-nowhere-except-to-hurt-and bitterness pattern of relationships that I have, for whatever reason, allowed myself to get into.
Pseudo-comical – picture a lady (?) ready for a fight.
She is pissed off, no end and is busy in the process – aggressive stance, kicking off her heels, shedding her jacket, rolling up her sleeves, removing her earrings, talking her mouth off (wait for me there!, utaniona! Who do you think…!)
Nothing really to write home about there, right? As a picture, I am sure this has been seen many many times in real life and in the movies and it has been thought many times when in a rage. I know I have been there and done that when I was blowing steam out my ears.
The bit that was new was seeing her turn to Jesus to tell him “Eish, my guy, ebu chill here a moment eh, I need to handle my business. I’m going to show this person/thing (situation, relationship) who they are messing/joking with! We ni ngoje tu hapa!”
I was so saddened and yet i was elated.
Saddened because, in theory, i know that would never be a way to treat my Lord and yet, how many times had i handled things like that lady(?) Told Jesus – kaa kando?
Elated because it was like seeing/recognising/acknowledging how i hhave handled relationship…my way or my way. A friend of mine, having turned 34, once said that she had prayed and told God – “vile umesleki, i am taking matters into my own hands. I have prayed and waited for the man and my clock is going tick tock tick tock – nachelewa and you are not hearing the desires of my heart”. She told 2 of us of her intention to have a baby with a former boyfriend who was now married with 4 children plus he had told her categoricall that he did not want any more children. She went ahead and got with child. She believed that he would change his mind when he saw his baby. Needless to say, the man turned his back on her. He said that he felt he had been trapped and it took a good number of years for him to agree to see his daughter. Life has been rough for her and today my friend is still struggling to bring up her daughter.
Why am i sharing this? Becasue for a long long time i have had an almost holier than thou attitude about this and many other scenarios. This morning i saw that, barring that there is no child, there is no difference between how Ciru & I have dealt with God …my way or my way.
There is no surer way to find oneself on the wrong bank of the river. So, in this morning’s visual, I saw myself this ng’ambo of River bitterness, desiring to be across the river – done with all the things that donot work, desiring to be across the river yet busy with a drill bit drilling holes in my boat! I have spent my life not consciously dealing with/acknowledging the pain or reframing the pain. From this place, doing things by my-selo, I am doomed to repeat the sin time and again. I am glad that God is so gracious and that that in His way, in answer to prayer, He has closed doors on unhealthy relationships. I am glad to have this visual. I pray that having seen this, I would remember that visual when I see myself beginning to tell Jesus “ebu move over I handle”, effectively cocking the rifle to promptly shoot myself in the foot.
So, thank you for that really powerful description.
Wa! A real eye-opener and a prayer item and makes me want to stay connected, no matter what!
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February 5, 2010 at 9:18 am
Despite not been in church for this series, i have followed the conversation on the blogs and just in awe what God is using pst. M to address.
@bitter and confused and want to change prostitute, i had no words for what you have been through. Like P.K, i wish to apologies on behalf of those men and seek your forgiveness for having made your lives hell.
I am praying for your healing & stand with you.
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February 5, 2010 at 9:59 am
Pastor M and family, thanks a lot for allowing God to use you as vessels to minister to us. May God bless you and enrich you in all ways according to His will and plans
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February 5, 2010 at 11:39 am
I missed this part of the series but i when i read the blog i knew it was time for me to really search me and get to Let GO.
@bitter and confused n want to change prostitute..i have you in my prayers..and i am humbled by the fact that you guys opened up!
@Torch,i went through the exact situation n i am still bitter and i realize i feed inner demon with bitterness,anger and betrayal..Thanks Man for the encouragement and the poem..i will let go!
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February 8, 2010 at 3:36 pm
@ bitter and confused. take a minute to read this. i am in a similar situation as the aggressor. i dont sleep at night. my skin has broken out. i am stressed, filled with guilt and hopelessness-if she’s coming to church, God is dealing with her, and believe you me, its anything but easy. i hate myself for how much i am hurting others and i am certain that i will not get away with it. we dont live in a world where people can hurt others with impunity. God is just, and that’s just the beginning.but you would never tell. i dress well, i smile like i own the world. please remember that she too is a work in progress and justice is surely coming, in fact- you should feel sorry for her. no one gets an easy ride like that. God is just, i know because i’m there.
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February 10, 2010 at 1:51 pm
Wow!
@ All cried out, I never ever thought Id hear such words coz they give me a glimpse of what my husband’s mistress is going thru. Do U mean all the confidence is a charade? I have absolutely no words. I am on a 21day fast to pray for families and I am going to pray for U coz U sound like U want to change but dont know how. I pray that God will give U strength to walk away. Marriage is a covenant. Its not a joke. Sweetie, God will give U strength to walk away. God bless U for sharing and for giving me some hope in resting assured that God is in control.
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