From Roses To Dishes

happily-ever-after .

Colossians 3:12-17
The Dream – The Drama – The Discovery – The Depth
Work on me, pray for them

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42 Responses to “From Roses To Dishes”

  1. Hi Pastor M,
    Heee, talk about relevance – the sermon was just that for me a 30 year old single woman who would lie to get married. After listening to your sermon “From Roses to Dishes” yaani I had to run home and write my thoughts down. It was really cool knowing what is behind the curtain. But as I was listening something else occurred to me – my relationship with God.
    Remember what you said about the stages – I think they also apply to our walk with Christ. I remember when I decided kabisa to follow Jesus – that was my dream stages, all was just glossy and I would wake up and just look out at the wonder and amazement of God – my God. I saw myself as the princess (I know I still am) and everything was just rosy and nice.
    Then came the drama stage – when I would ask God for something and the way I saw it – He didn’t give it to me. That was frustrating for me, I was annoyed and my prayers were more of a monologue with me telling Jesus just how disappointed with Him I was and all. Especially when it came to a husband. I had this list that described the kind of man I wanted for a husband down to the very last detail. It didn’t help that all my friends were getting married but poor old me, there were no results from my prayers and everyone was asking all these questions
    Followed by the Depth stage – I quit my whining and decided I will go with the Master’s plan because for real – God gives the best to those who leave the choice to Him. And so I started allowing God to have His way in me without being resentful or thinking – “I will do the bear minimum to get me to Heaven”. I started letting God lead and guide me.
    Then the Discovery stage – I am dazzled by the things God does. I don’t have the husband yet, I do hope that God gives me this guy but even if He doesn’t, as long as He keeps me in His tight embrace. I am so cool with that. Discovering every day just how much God loves and cares for me, having Him show me what to do, where to go, how to change, knowing that He knows me so well and even with all that I am that He still loves me – that is too great for me to comprehend.

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  2. I am single and 30 and dream of getting married one day!….Today’s sermon was just meant for me…..I have attended so many bridal showers that talk a whole lot about the dreamy stage and try to caution on the drama stage…no one ever seems to tell us that there is life beyond the drama stage, to me it sounded that drama would be an every day thing forever as soon as you “discover” each other…kumbe its the other way around…the drama is there beacuse you have not discovered each other…that was deep for me!! For me the song…”We have Overcome” made the most perfect sense…because Thanks be to God who always causes us to triumph! I now know for sure that when the gift of marriage comes my way….it will be great and now received with understanding! Thank you for showing us beyond the veil!!

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  3. hey pasi am quarter a century old and looking forward to marrying some day in the near future.todays sermon makes me wish tomorrow i’ll awake to another sunday morning.i left equipped with the four “D’s” dream drama discovery n finally depth which define what marriage life is all about.with this information the least i could be is a R.I.M(Realistic Induvidual in Marriage).thank you and God bless you abundantly!

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  4. Pastor M..thank you for the great sermons that have inspired me to re-examine every area of my life as i seek to fulfill God’s purpose for my life, which by the way, i discovered after attending the ‘True North- Discover your destiny’ series. Each sunday at Mavuno is a true blessing.

    I’m single , and looking to get married one day and today’s message was eye-opening. Thank you for the non-censored truth about marriage.

    Now that we’re learning about marriage, I’m curious to know what God’s teaching is pertaining to polygamy, a situation which is very common in our kenyan society. kindly talk about such marriages and what God’s word says about polygamous unions. How do such marriages fit into God’s plan for us?

    Looking forward to part 2 of this great series. Have a blessed week.

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  5. Simply me.. Says:

    “Psst….Clear?……Clear????”….”YES!! CLEAR!! Ok Jump!” Wiiii…Blotch!! “WHAAAAT!?” Oh my! That tickled me blue! That hit home with a BANG to very many people! I was truly amazed to learn a lot of unspoken truths of marriage. And I must confess I’m a victim of the deceit! I’ve even deceived others! Whenever I attend a wedding, I’m always interested to look at the couple as they exchange their vows. It’s always an interesting sight to see them look at each other, so fondly and adoringly as they say “for better or for worse…” etc. What I always wonder is, do these people REALLY understand what they’re saying? I’ve even taken it a notch higher, by sometimes asking my married pals if they realized the real meaning of the “worse” part as they exchanged their sacred vows. By the way most didn’t. Trust me. My research findings have proven as much to me.

    Eish! The sermon was really educating. I liked how Pastor Muriithi put it, by saying that “Drama is what God uses to refine us through our spouse.” Eh? Pastor Muriithi, and you thought you weren’t deep? All evidence to the contrary! In my mind I was thinking “so you think you’re deep?…Dream on!” Your wife’s qualities have definately rubbed-off on you. I’ve learnt alot from you Pastor and thanks for the priceless lesson. I’ve learnt that I must be ready to rub shoulders with someone, to know what’s up their sleeve. There’s no other way out. So now I know that as we look for a spouse, simply put, we’re actually in an elimination & selection process, of looking for who’s and which issues we’re willing to handle, because we ALL have issues. But THANK GOD there’s a solution. “Seek ye first the Kingdom of God,” His purpose for me, etc and all these things (a spouse + their issues, etc) shall be added unto me. But it doesn’t just stop there. “Work on me, pray for them.” Eh? You’re TOO deep Pastor Muriithi!

    I was surprised by Pastor Wamae when he shared my feedback to him of what causes problems in marriage (question of the day). Yes, I do believe that lots of couples suffer from “familiarity complex,” which breeds contempt. Another dangerous comfort zone is formed, which as described in the Discovery stage, may lead to “amicable” disasters like divorce. My, isn’t that tragic? But thanks Pastor Muriithi for talking of the Depth stage, which most people (myself being the first) didn’t know of and had no clue regarding its existence. But it so made sense! I sure look forward to that stage at some point in my life.

    I loved the path of setting rules of engagement to be applied during conflict resolution; being specific, no raising one’s voice, no “hitting below the belt,” etc. This is real war eh? I believe these rules make the difference between seeing it again (a successful marriage) or NEVER again. I’ve discovered that afterall, in any problem, I should embrace the fact that “this too shall pass.” Thanks Pastor Muriithi. Be blessed.

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  6. Hi Pastor M! I am about to turn 29, and this series could not have come at a better time, as my biological clock has been ticking so loudly it is starting to beep! :)) The sermon “Not About Me” was especially deep for me.

    However, today’s sermon has been ringing in my head the whole day! I am still chuckling at the “Yes-Clear!” story! Having attended many bridal showers, as WN aptly puts it, all I hear about is the Dream and/or Drama phases of marriage. It is weird that the more experienced wives do not talk about the Discovery and Depth phases (unless they have never been fortunate to experience them!) So all along I have been thinking that any marriage starts either on a dramatic or dreamy note and stays that way all through its course!

    It therefore came as a shock to me that my dreamy bubble burst on my now two-year realationship with my boyfriend. Although the drama at the time was unbearable, we put up with each other. Miraculously, just as we were about to throw in the towel, the Discovery phase set in. The challenge is now to check our independence as we continue to discover ourselves. My question now is, is this cycle expected to repeat itself in marriage now that it has already happened outside of marriage?

    I am really looking forward to part II of this series, now that it is evident that there are more bubbles to be burst and revelations made! Be blessed!

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  7. Yesterday’s sermon was absolutely insightful. Thanks pastor M for sharing so openly, the real picture behind the veil. As i sat there listening, the answer to the question of the day became apparent. What is wrong with marriage today is that many couples don’t make it past the drama phase, which is very sad.

    But thank God that through all the difficulty, it’s still possible to find peace by aligning ourselves to his purpose and not focusing too much on the mess we are in. Better still, thank God the discovery stage exists. Halleluya!!! That right there was my Ah! moment when the bulb lit and i thought how encouraging. There IS light at the end of the tunnel and marriage is NOT synonymous with doom afterall. What we therefore need to be askin God for is strength and grace to enable us persevere through that dreaded phase and in the end emerge closer than ever and wiser in the things of God.

    I appreciate all the wisdom shared.

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  8. Christian Gal Says:

    Pastor M,

    Yesterday’s sermon was quite an eye opener!

    Now, my perspective on marriage has been radically altered and I think my raging hormones can now take a backseat.

    Thanks for the insights because I now know that the right spouse for me is one whom I can have a deep relationship with.

    For me, it is now a process of refining myself and getting to know myself better, while on the other hand looking at the male friends around me and evaluating whether or not they would be a good fit in my life.

    Asante sana.

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  9. Jovial chap Says:

    Pastor M, wee unafaa viboko! the Psssst! Clear part was too hilarious..wonder how ur wife puts up wth u..she must have replaced some ribs..al in al, gr8 service, am a guy,30 single..and i have decided to align may way to christ, and my future partner will find me there..who knows ..i mit end up watchn the sunset or working like coal miners with my better 1/2, hav a great week n thanx again..great sermon..

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  10. pastor M, sun sermon waz gud, tho most of us wa left kinda sad, to learn thea iz drama n it dsnt end soon, iz scarely to say tha least. im early 30s n waz hopin il find tha one n live tha dream. nw thnx to u thea is no the one n drms r jst tht drms. The purpose part tho waz upliftin, n av decd il pursue that ist, rather thn happnss. n opefly il find one who cn allign to my purpose.
    Thnx so much 4 tha revelation, i nw knw tha true bearing.

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  11. hey Pastor M.
    the sermon was so timely. my boyfriend of three years and i sat as you took as through the 4 D’s dream, drama. discovery and depth and you actually gave us the true picture of what to expected in marriage but better yet how to handle the happy times and the bad times. it was an eye opener for us and i thank the Lord for that. that evening, i got engaged and what was so memorable was ” i want to finish the rest of the D’S with you’ drama, discovery and depth” that was deep.
    thank you once again for a timely eye opening sermon.

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  12. Hi Pastor M
    thank you for your wonderful insights again! I must say that these truths that we are learning are life changing. This is one of those moments when we say “my life before happily ever after” and my life after “happily ever after”. Six years in marriage now, and we are just getting over the drama stage. THANK GOD THERE IS HOPE! I look forward with courage and renewed strenght to the “discovery stage” and my prayer is that we shall live long enough to experience the “depth”.
    By the way there was something really special about worship on sunday.I felt an overflow of the holy spirit.When you prayed again at the end for the wounded to experience God’s love and for the affirmation of Gods’ love for us, I felt a sweet yet pwerful sensation and I knew that the holy spirit was there in love..It was overwhelming.Thank you for being such a blessing.

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  13. Pastor M. I have a question is it possible to go through these phases when you are dating. I had been sseing this guy for two years a nd I was sure that he was “the one” ( he he ) I had really prayed about it .We went through the dream stage but the drama stage was reaally dramatic mpaka I jsut let the realtionship go because it was too much. Qestion should I have hang in there or is dating supposed to just be dreamy then drama begins in marriage. This question has reaally bothere me so I would appreciate hearing from a man of God regarding this

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  14. the clouds Says:

    so how is a christian to behave when going through the storm/drama? its really hard to smile with pals, not to mention its also pretentious. Another thing, if marriage is so hard, why does God require it in the fashion that we experience it, or is it possible that we have taken it out of context. Really it shouldnt be this crazy

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  15. Pastor M, i think Sunday’s sermon was the Lord’s way of reaching out to my wife and i. We previously heard about the phases of marriage during a Nairobi Baptist Church retreat facilitated by u and ur wife Carol. However, at that stage, we were fully in the dream phase. Currently we are knee deep in the drama phase, it’s a challenge, it’ frustrating, it’s confusing..its also eye opening and thought provoking. It sometimes feels like a non stop test, but i’d like to share our experience with everyone. Marriage is real, doubts about ‘the one’ have no basis, by the point of saying you do, its a forever thing, the phases are constant reminder of the promises and commitments we made. I have learnt that a raised voice never communicates, while a ‘nil by mouth’ scenario frustrates. But, by seeking Divine guidance eg. Taking a time out and praying reminds us of the love and companionship we sought in marriage, and through this many a ‘dome’ have been resolved amicably. Surprisingly, as ‘dramatic’ as the drama phase can be, we always emerge stronger, more commited to each other and even more in love. In addition to this we are members of a MEG (marriage enrichment group) which brings together other likeminded married couples every month. We discuss things openly and honestly to enrich each others marriages. This helps us appreciate that we are not alone in this wonderful journey and all married couples in varied degrees and situations face challenges everyday. Pastor M, thanks for refreshing our learning experience and for the never ending relevance of your sermons.

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  16. Hi, Really glad have been around for the Jan series and praying i will catch the whole of part 2. i thank God since been really also enjoying praise n worship especially this year and feel like we have been getting a real breakthrough in worship. God Bless the worsip team loads.
    Just wanted to comment on service leading.. feel like we need to be careful to make the comments, jokles and announcements from the front relevant and appropriate to show a difference between Christian and secular forums.. a good example was the announcement for the Men’s meeting.. Meat and sex… would it have been better to explain why men need to meet to discuss about sex? Maybe we struggle more as Men on issues of sex and need to discuss Godly Principles to help us stand? Leaving it hanging made it seem like just another forum to enjoy and not one to help? Purpose of Live at the Village? if also explained then it wouldnt seem like just another secular gig featuring a famous secular artist..
    Lots of blessings and i must say the whole Church experience is a big blessing. Sling n Stone.. we wish we could get videos of ur skits when we miss Church.
    Blessings..
    Mike

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  17. Hi…interestingly after the service…well, several hours later, I happened to watch a movie which turned out to be surprisingly aligned to the teachings by Pastor M this Sunday. For those of you who like movies, check out “fire proof”, or you could check out “www.fireproofyourmarriage.com”. Be blessed

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  18. Sorry, just checked, its “www.fireproofmymarriage.com”

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  19. Pastor M thank you for the sermon it was a blessings to me as i have been blaming myself that i started my marriage on a wrong foundation because i didn’t go for any counselling.Passie ,when i was watching the peer factor i was ooh no one told me all this ……i could have worn the full armour …..and for the singles can you shout Amen for passie for unveiling the curtains for this wonderful journey that you will be a blessing to your marriage and the word divorce might be non exsitent . I have already jumped into the wall ,and i didn’t know what lies behind the wall .When you posed the questions,i tld myself Passie can you unveil the curtains because am almost throwing in the towel. and you saved a sister who was giving up as have been praying for directions.GOd answered my prayers.I only experienced the dream part in my dating ,and am now in the middle of the storm and God heard my cries that he used you to show me this storm will be over and i was just on my seat edge to hear there is hope which i can’t wait for……and i said alleluyah only to hear there is also danger in discovery…Now am strong after you prayed for the wounded i felt a cool breeze which assured me God will see me through the rest of the DS .
    May God grant you more wisdom as you impact the society.I would like to answer wangeci and tel her that in dating you only experience Dream and Drama and Yes the same phase will come again in marriage ??Maybe passie can tell you more….

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  20. It’s amaizing how the sermons touch on everyone. The single, happy marriages and difficult marriages.

    As a recent married couple, we are on dream mode. You opened the curtain and enlightened us with what is to come after-the drama. I trust that with guidance we will find a balance when that times comes. If not, we will be knocking on your door- at home; so it’s to the best of your interest you pray for us.

    To all my single firends I say “Yes, Yes; It’s clear. Come one, Come all”

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  21. Hi there, I am really happy about this series, and the fact that it is being taught at church. Too many people are getting into marriage without being ready/equipped for it and our enemy, the devil has really used it to hurt our homes, communities and society as well. Thanks Pastor M, (and all your support team at Mavuno) for teaching on this, and telling it like it is. I have had a very sober and realistic attitude towards marriage and have read widely on what Christian authors/teachers have to say about it; but what really hit home this past Sunday was the reality of ‘for better, for worse’ particularly brought about by the story of assistant Pastor Des and his wife. She exemplifies the meaning of the word ‘Love’ as defined in I cor;13- totally selfless. I pray that God may continue to teach me, teadch us this love. And when my time comes to fulfil my purpose via marriage, may I be faithful in showing love like this. Thx n God bless

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  22. Hi Pastor M,

    Sat through the sermon with balancing terars in my eyes….”Pray for them work on me”….the balancing tears were because for me the sermon was coming two years too late…or so I thought…but then again I remembered God is always on time…I may not be able to salvage my broken marrriage ..but I know God is able to restore and create. You see I walked out of my marital home two years ago…after 10 years of disilusionment and pain I couldn’t ake it any more…when I came back to my senses my husband doesn’t want me back anymore as he is deeply hurt. For my own sanity have decided to accept the situation and move on…whatever that means. So my question is..what happens to those of us who did not “Pray for them and work on ourselves” If the danmage is done what next?

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  23. Weeee! Two things got to me this past Sunday.

    The first is that it’s simply wonderful the way you and Pst Carol are “exposing” your lives so that the rest of us can be helped. (I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t say the things you do if you guys hadn’t agreed on them beforehand).

    The other was the sobering reality that some couples actually split up in the discovery phase. You’d think that if you survived the drama, you’d make it through just about anything. This thought really drove home the truth that for our marriage to last, it has to be bigger than the two of us.

    Thanks man.

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  24. Hi Pst M,
    the veil has truly been lifted from my eyes. The sermon truly helped me understand my parents marriage. Its truly sad that many years in marriage they never quite got out of the drama stage which totally poisoned my outlook on marriage. I’ve been a strong believer in singlehood, all for the wrong reasons…

    I thank God that through this series I am gaining a healther outlook on marriage and seeing that the storms do eventually pass. The key being “work on me, pray for them”.

    Thanks for letting God use you to reach the rest of us who are in need of some hope.
    God bless you!

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  25. hi guys

    first its the drama story is kinda scary but so true , thanks pasi for making it so clear that is okay to go through that peroid , to be honest know i understand why married people have so much pressure to give a strong face wahhh ………. but instead of try to change him or her u work on me and pray for them . pasi i honestly thank you because i dont think anyone would be as open as u are with us about marriage . My perspective of marriage has changed big time n its a nice feeling GOD a kubless i cant wait for next service .

    I have a concern last sunday in worship the worship leader imitates shon paul ) ” rock away” as we worshiped , it kinda disturbed me honestly am not being spiritual , n i dont think thats GOOD roho safi lets be careful not to be to worldly.sorry if u offend anyone .

    thanks again pasi Barake tele

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  26. I felt it was so awesome for all the lessons in Sunday’s service to be going out to everyone like that. I remember my wife and I sitting in our PMCC class last year and commenting how there needs to be a “PMCC for singles”. That was because it seemed the only place to find out about marriage, and answers to the many other questions on the meaning of life…. was in marriage. It was in PMCC that we were rapidly learning it was not so! About how God uses marriage to disciple and shape us into who He wants us to be. Talk about epiphany!! We didn’t find out too late, but we wished other singles out there knew this too…(and hastily proceeded to recommend to all our engaged or soon to be engaged friends!)… so thanks for that Pastor M. And even now fresh in marriage… the sermon was more sobering than ever..knowing whats ahead. But at least we got a sneek peek to the ‘end’ (thanks Pastor M for sharing your life…and Joyce and Yafesi for stellar representation!)…because as they say – vision is more important than sight. And when the tough times come, we don’t have to focus on them as ‘our lot’ but to pray and fight to push on through..to keep our eyes on the prize and say… we’re in it to the depth! 🙂

    M

    PS: On the question abt where to look for love? This is a short interesting clip by Myles Munroe that reiterates what we’ve already learnt so far -http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qfPq4B4rVsI

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  27. just a gal Says:

    I’m grateful for the sermons on happily eva after.I’m 25,single&wrking 2wards bein a faithful servant.it ws great having the veil lifted,Pastor M.Most importantly the story about Des ws rly inspiring.Pator M,i simply want 2say thnku 4always delivering messages that r practical.I had a light bulb moment wen u spoke of purpose filled lyf….am a lawyer tho av bin tarmacking for a yr nw after coming back to kenya,but after ur msg about purpose.It changed my prayer patterns&nw I’ve bin praying to not only find a job but to fulfil my purpose in the fight for human ryts&b a fearless influencer.I’d lost faith in Kenya but nw no1 can convince me to go abroad again for jobbos as I believe God in his infinite wisdom placed me in Kenya as a lawyer to be the next Obama of my generation.Attending mavuno makes me proudly kenyan.Sorry i digressed from the sermons about marriage.PS:I fully believe tho i may be jobless,my faith is renewed thnks to ur sermons that help me live each day in God’s presence.THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD I SHALL BE FINE!Hope ur wife is feeling better.

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  28. just a gal Says:

    PS:Want to thnk the prayer team for praying for me in my hunt for my purpose filled job.

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  29. Hi Pastor M,

    I was truly tickled by the ” … you are just like your mother …” comment, I am just sitting here and thinking about the entire sermon and so looking forward to next week. Tell me Pr., is it possible to go through more than one stage at once (ok save for the dream which we went through those years). The reason I ask is because we do stuff with my hubby and we are also cool with everyone doing their own thing. Infact he wants to go do his Masters and I told him he is free to proceed (we will be 5 years old in marraige in March and have a 9-month old precious daughter). Then we have the drama which sometimes I feel comes about unecessarily but we have it anway … so is it possible to be in the drama and discovery stages at the same time. Thank you so much for being such a blessing to us. Looking forward to soaking in more wisdom from you and Caroline on Sunday. Be blessed abundantly.

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  30. Pastor oooh!!!! yaani this was jus the one. I see most people believe that this was jus for the married pple but honestly……this phases are there even in relationships. the question is….how do you go thru this esp. the drama when you dating. should you stomach all this hoping that youll proceed to the discovery and then the depth where i believe is the point at which marriage will come in.
    Past. God bless you mightly as you minister to a generation that has been corrupted and poisoned by soo much TV and stuff.

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  31. clear……yes, clear. We re now six years into marriage and wot? Last was chaotic, now i know we were going through the drama face of our marriage. I couldn’t resist to laugh as you gave the story of the boys who lied to their friends. Towards the end of the year, we were “besting” a wedding of our good friend and i kept thinking and wondering what i was leading them into..With the insights i have learnt in this series, i got even more strength to say …clear coz i now hav an understanding what to expect.
    By the way, this year we are such good friends with my hubby…i guess we are past the drama phase now.
    Thanks for being very relevant to this generation. We love you and we pray for you for God to continually use you.

    Thanks once again

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  32. hi pastor M.well,am not old enuf to get married thu above 18.last sunday sermon was so real though i have a question.am in a relationship and we seem to be going through the stages you talked about.
    1is it right to be in a relationship that young?
    2am i with the one coz i feel lyk it?
    (if not able to adress in church on sunday pliz use my email)

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  33. Pstr M,

    Thanks for the sermon last sunday. Yaani this is so true that at one point I thought you were going through the same marriage as I am. Am actually on my 15th year in marriage and having going thru my dream for more than 10 years…(yes! 10) with my hubby,being best of friends ,living life to the fullest with no cares in the world and loving on each other seroiusly. Wacha until drama checked in on our 12th year… It was hell but this really helped us to really know one another,our strengths and weaknesses and realise that we are not angels,I mean u get to know the tru cclour of ur partner.

    After everything has settled down,we are now in our discovery phase,comfy with each other, secure and building up on our love life ..WAAAH but we’ve had to break a sweat. We are looking forward to totally discover each other with a view of spending out “Depth year” together. Am encouraging other couple to hang on and not bailout esp. on drama stage as there is lots of goodis waiting thereafter. God bless

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  34. hey Past,
    Are yor sermons copy righted’? I had a coffe date with a married man yesterday evening and he was busy trying to justfy to me why he has to cheat on his wife of 8 years and jus how much ‘hell’ shes put him through and i jus found myself sharing the whole of this months series with him which he listened to and guess what? he asked me that we pray for his marriage(in the midst of our date) and i couldnt believe that i had kinda touched his life. Its not my word but Gods word thru you that i believe will make an impact in many marriages and relationships. God bless you past for your encouraging words and cant wait for sunday to buy for my friend this months DVD.

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  35. Pastor M…God bless you…
    I thank God cos during this Sermon, i was with my Galfriend of 3yrs now…I am however somehow bewildered by this marriage thing…Yesterday, i was talking to a married lady (whom i dont even know her name) and she was very open about marriage and wat to expect in marriage, infact watever she brought on board was concuring wit ur sermon…However, she mentioned some things that make me have a very negative attitude about marriage….I have women friends in the office that are married n some even hold positions in their churches (not Mavuno) but the kind of lives that they lead is undescriptive!!!!
    Pastor, i was about to engage my girlfriend sometimes this year but some of these occurences drew me back…..We have been having some drama in our relationship but most of the time we are more than fine….I remember after the sermon i asked her which D describes our relationship n she was like…”DISCOVERY!!!”. I feel like we are in the first three D’s though…
    Pastor…I need ur prayer cos i need to settle down with my ‘bird’ (thats the nickname for my GAL)….Please help…..

    One more thing. Could u please enlighten our ladies on how to strike a balance btwn their career life n marriage life?? Its quite disturbing to find a man preparing dinner for his wife five days a week thanks to their careers….

    One more prayer request….i need a stable job cos im planning to settle down by the end of this year…..

    God bless and be well…

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  36. Sir Daniel Says:

    Pastor M! Yaani as I sat there listening to the unveiling it was to say the least rather unnerving! I used to think that as long as you are ‘ope’n and ‘real’ with each other then some of these stages can be skipped altogether. . .So after the sermon I have decided to think of it as a stage that I as the man can “fast forward” not in ignoring issues or pretending that things are sawa but by focusing on changing me through God’s help and praying for my spouse. I am getting married some time this year and as I approach the date I realize just how much work and responsibility I have as the man in this relationship and from this position of feeling helpless I realize it’s where God wants me to be….in TOTAL reliance on Him, it is truly only Him that makes marriages work. As we shared via emails with my mizizi family one of us shared a very deep revelation of a story we have heard so many times and I have pasted some of the excerpts from that insight and I hope it helps someone out there in realizing the realness of not just the dream stage but also the drama stage – the story of Leah, Rachel and Jacob.
    One other constant theme over the past few Sundays is the place of individual purpose where marriage is concerned. One of my mentors has constantly told me over the years that the best formula for marriage are some thing they referred to as The Three M’s- Master, Mission, Mate.
    First we need a real and individual relationship with our Master who then reveals our Mission and as we discover our mission then our Mate comes along, our missions do not necessarily have to be identical but when we each find the other in their mission field then “surprises” are avoided in future. We learn how to compliment each others gifts and callings and create a great synergy of this gift of marriage.
    May God Bless you and your wife for sharing with us those deep dark but very real sides of marriage from your real experiences.

    >> Laban had 2 daughters, Leah and Rachel. “Leah had weak eyes, while Rachel was shapely and beautiful.” Jacob loved Rachel and he offered to work 7 years for her. When the 7 years were up, Laban substituted Leah for Rachel on the night of the wedding. Jacob discovered the deception only after he’d consummated the marriage with Leah. Jacob accepted his fate and remained with Leah. But he later also married Rachel, the bride of his choice, “and he loved Rachel more than Leah.”
    Yet, at the end, it was Leah who became Jacob’s primary wife. Rachel died at a young age; so that most of Jacob’s married life was actually spent with Leah. In addition to this, it was Leah who mothered most of Jacob’s children, the future tribes of Israel and it was she, not Rachel, who ultimately was buried with Jacob in Hebron.
    Why did this marriage—the marriage that formed the foundation of the Jewish nation, the marriage that produced every single Jew living since—have to come about in such an appalling manner? And why did Jacob have to go through this absurd experience?
    The drama that occurred at the wedding of the father of the Jewish people occurs at almost every wedding. When you get married, you may think that you’re marrying Rachel: the comely, perfect and fictitious spouse that you chose in your dreams. But in reality, you’re bound to discover that you ended up with Leah, a human being possessing layers of unresolved wounds and tension. Initially you may love and appreciate only the Rachel dimension of your marriage partner and despise the Leah part of that individual, yet as life progresses you’ll come to discover that it’s precisely the Leah dimension of your spouse, more than anything else, that was always meant for your soul. Because it’s the shortcomings and imperfections of your spouse that challenge you to transcend your ego and become the person you are capable of being. <<
    Do your best, bring out the best in others: (sounds like Work on me and Pray for them )

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  37. Woa was that fun or not so fun! Pastor M, indeed you are deep…Carol u did something, HE CHANGED. We or rather i have been wondering about the other side of the fence. Am in my late 20s and frankly quite infact all my friends caution me that ‘my bar’ is too high. Every eligible man i meet now has been under intence scruitity as i do not want a prolonged drama phase. Ya we have now all agreed that yes there will be drama therefore i hav been wondering…’this one, hapana we shall begin fighting within a year, that one not educated enough, the other is clearly intimidated by my hons degree yet all he hears is how am about to clear masters! Thanks for season 1 as i now endevor to b a better ‘the one’ for my ‘the one’ and i know that there wil be storms ahead therefore we should all pray for patience coz good Lord knows mine runs thin more often than not

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  38. Thanks Pastor m.I NEEDED to hear the Sunday sermon.”Work on me,pray for them”.I have decided when i step out of home every Sunday morning i will do the praying for them instead of grambling.God Bless.

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  39. pastor M, coming to church this year had been just one of my resolutions. usually i start with syke then die off within a few weeks. But since i came to mavuno, i find myself anticipating next service,everyone at home is shocked, my friends are wondering which church is this that makes her lenga hanging and they end up coming out of curiosity and actually get hooked on it themselves. I find myself bringing more people to church! i(f you had known me and my friends last year, you would understand the excitement in my voice) now seeking God is my topmost priority and i thank him for using you and this church to speak to people like us, who were too afraid to go to church because we thought we would never have been accepted. Now i am aware of Gods love for me, and it has changed my life.thank you

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  40. Fwench gal Says:

    Hey.how random is that daniel?guess who this is.i was just about to post that forward about the leah and rachel story.it should honestly be taught all over.it’s so so deep.

    The questions i have for pastor m are too many to write right now but i will be asking them soon after end of part two.I pray and hope that even as you and your team experience such success with your sermon serieses Pastor M and with the very obviously-from-God messages that you give us,that our gratitude and compliments won’t derail you or cause you to lose focus because Mavuno has become a home for so many wounded.we blog about some of our hurts but there’s a whole lot more healing needed if we’re to become fearless influencers and through you,God has given us all a place we can enjoy ourselves maturely,learn about the dreamy aspects of our relationship with God while still learning that He IS a just and holy God and driving the point home without making Him seem inaccessible to a common sinner like what almost every person views themselves as.
    I love how you all present the Word.It’s so balanced.Thank God for all of you.And may He shower a thousand x10 to the power of a thousand blessings on you.

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  41. been reading all this, and i wonder pastor M, can i get an audio of these messages, am not a regular at mavuno, please let me know how i can get, the happily ever afer, and this other series, man i need to be part of this..

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  42. av just visiteed this page….i cannot get the sermon notes only a powerpoint thingy thats ot communicating much.pls save a life…..

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