Looking For Love… In All The Wrong Places


Thanks for all the comments. Please keep them coming! Also questions you’d like Pst. M to address. Here’s a summary of this last Sunday’s sermon.

Myths about marriage…
Marriage will end my loneliness
Marriage will heal my brokenness
Marriage is for everyone
The myth of ‘the one’

John 4:3-30, 42 – Samaritan woman – doing the same thing over and over… and hoping for a different result each time.

We are thirsty people…
*We thirst for love – Each of us needs a relationship with someone who sees us as we truly are and yet still accepts us fully and unconditionally
*We thirst for purpose – Each of us needs to feel that our lives count for something bigger than ourselves


Next Sunday’s title… ‘It’s Not About Me‘.


19 Responses to “Looking For Love… In All The Wrong Places”

  1. Paster M, i loved the sunday 11th sermon it was captivating and very enjoyable not to mention the previous sermon.Am a new member,well actualy an attender still,at mavuno and so far i love it.


  2. The sermon was straight to the point and you knew exactly where to take examples from and if you ask me you reached the people with the message very well,cant wait for the next sermon


  3. Lasy weeks sermon was one that i deeply needed to hear. I got into a relationship with the wrong man about seven years ago. Me being young and weak, i need someone to love me and he knew this and took total advantage. This however resulted in the greatest gift ever, my darling daughter. I got out of that relationship a few years ago. Now i love myself first, i care for my daughter and the man in my life respects me.
    All these things fell into place because i renewed my relationship with God, the source. For that i thank Mavuno.
    I have joined mizizi and also plan to dedicate me and my daughter to God. Its a great thing finding true love, unconditional love from God. Looking forward to Sundays sermon. Until then Be blessed.


  4. The sermon titled “looking for love in all the wrong places” spoke to me volumes. I once believed in the fairy tale “the one” and I thought the one had found me – I was living in this illusion that we would live happily ever after. I prayed fervently for our relationship and I even formed this triangle with God at the top, my boyfriend on the right and me on the left and so whenever I was praying for our relationship I always referred to it as “our triangle” and for some time it was great.

    However, for some I was always explaining my boyfriends actions to my family, giving excuses for his behavior, making him go to church and sort of expecting him to do the things I wanted him to do and just assuming he should know what he is supposed to be and do for me without me having to tell him. I kept trying to make him someone he wasn’t and that made both of us very frustrated. We kept fighting about little things, I kept wondering why he couldn’t understand that all wanted was for him to be the best that he could be. Sometimes he would say he just wanted to tell me what was going on, he didn’t want me to fix his problems but the way I saw it, if he was telling me about it, then we needed to fix the problem.

    I truly loved this man but the day he gave me a ring all I could think of was “I need to run and run fast for my life”. It dawned on me that I didn’t know him because all along I was trying to make him into the ideal man I wanted and as a result I really didn’t know him. I panicked because I realized I would be marrying a stranger and that scared me. Being the Melphleg that I am, I didn’t want any confrontation and so I took the ring but a few weeks later after a lot of thought and tears and prayer I decided I need to break up. Not only didn’t I know my boyfriend, I didn’t know who I was and I didn’t understand why I felt the need to keep solving my boyfriends problem. I requested him to come home and I broke up with him.

    After the break up the societal pressure begun, my girlfriends could not understand how I could break up with this guy who was good looking, from a prominent family and so on and so forth, and sometimes I didn’t know how to explain. Anyway, to cut a long story short after listening to the sermon I realized I was in the relationship for the wrong reason. I understood I need to be complete in God and fully surrendered to God so that I don’t expect certain things from a man, when it’s only God who can satisfy. I am grateful I came to Church and listened to this sermon and I am looking forward to next Sunday to learn some more. God bless you.


  5. The issue I would really like addressed in church is the importance of good grooming for Christian ladies and gentlemen.

    I believe that this is one area where Christians and especially Kenyans have slacked on. I feel it is important to look good on the inside as well as the outside.

    So Pastor M, please talk about hygiene, hair, dressing etc.


  6. Question
    Lately we have a number of divorced people in the church who are remarrying? Just wondering is it okay to do so– Please clarify.


  7. Hi i am a new member at the church,to be precise my first visit was last sunday,and all along i have been walking from church to church looking for the word,a friend of mine told me about mavuno and how the sermon of her first visit 4th jan touched her,i could not wait to for 11th ,i came and now want to belong.
    The Sermon also touched me in a great way in volumes i felt blessed and went blessing others with the message.
    The qoute of that sermon i felt was “if the grass is always greener on the other side its because you do not water the grass on your side”


  8. Deep.That was the Jan 11 sermon. Nuff said


  9. Dear Pastor M.,
    Thank you for the apology you made to all the singles in Mavuno church , it was deep and heartfelt. To be honest your whole sermon echoed many of the thoughts that have crossed my mind as I navigate my way through what as a single in what I like to call churchdom. Spread the good news to other churches that singles need not be treated like second class citizens.!!!

    Please talk about what happens when friends get married, I think the disconnect that takes place is more apparent in women then in men, perhaps. Some stay friends with their single friends, others drift into mommy, married mode and their whole talk changes, they become different persons and guess what more often then not you are not invited to the party!!!. They have ‘moved on’ . Same thing should you get divorced. This is not say that singles are absolved of any wrongs, we sometimes are not understanding, not practical and probably do not take into consideration some of the new responsibilities that come with being married. How do the singles and married friends balance or work out their relationships between each other. What are the boundaries to set in their relationships???

    Also in marriage, how do you manage your expectations of each other? Balance work and home life so that you both don’t go totally off the deep end???. Some people expect their spouses for all intents and purposes to be a replica of their mom or dad, when in today’s world roles have changed and it is simply not practical.

    As for the hygiene grooming thing, (what I like to call keeping your game on), that somebody mentioned earlier. Lets be honest, Kenyan men and women on the whole have across the board including churchdom totally slacked off!! My personal pet peeve is the butt cracking squash my body jeans look!!! At the risk of sounding like a fashion Nazi, when you instructs us to kneel and pray like you did the first Sunday of 2009, you do not I repeat do not want to have to see this !!! But that is not what bothers me the most, it is more like simply observing the basics tenets of hygiene that matters. For heaven’s sake!!! at the very least , brush your teeth, wash your body and hair (when necessary) and another thing, guys those of you who keep that one long dirty nail(you know who you are!!!), cut it off!!!! I feel like launching a ministry on towards that end….

    Thanks again for the very honest approach more then anything that probably is what keeps Mavuno what it is, real. Can’t wait for next Sunday’s sermon. Many blessings.


  10. Hi,

    I really need to hear this sermon series as am 25 goin on 26 not dating attending weddings (cheering on my pals as they get married) could someone please upload it?


  11. Last sunday’s sermon was real and deep.
    I have been thinking a lot about marriage, trying to look at it with a realistic sober mind and not through rose glasses and the sermon has set me on the right path.
    I cannot wait for Sunday for the next part about the series.
    God bless.


  12. Hi. I liked the series on Sunday. It’s amazing cause i was zoned out when i came to Church that morning and praying i will get something…anything. Man!!! Let’s just say i got it. I got it and made changes in my life. More so, in how i see myself. The main thing i got is that there’s really no rush to marriage. I am not going to allow pressure (both internally & externally) make me make this choice. Funny enough, that afternoon, i went for a picnic where all we talked about was marriage. However, i really tried to express the no-pressure side of the story. I thank God for using Mavuno to impact decisions we make as young Kenyans today.


  13. Hi Pastor M,

    With reference to what you spoke about regarding “The One”…..I understand your point which makes a lot of sense.

    My question is: How do I reconcile the issue of there not being “the one’ with the fact that God had planned and purposed my life before I was born and if that plan includes marriage, then He had purposed a husband for me?

    Did He then generally purpose “a husband” and not someone in particular?

    Also, I believe of the plan for one’s life includes marriage then there are things God has purposed to birth through that union for His kingdom…..would that then be a case of He works all things for good and just works around our choices as opposed to us walking in a pre purposed/destined path as we submit to His lordship every day?

    Or maybe it’s just a case of me leaning on my own understanding a la Proverbs 3:5 and needing to exhale?:-D


  14. Hi Pastor M,

    Unless I was sleeping but I remember you saying that from the bible, there is no verse that talks of wives submitting to their husbands. I am abit confused as Ephesians 5:22-33 says: “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands”.

    So does Colossians 3:18-19 reads: Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.

    Please enlighten me


  15. i heard him say that there is nowhere in the bible that says WOMEN, submit to MEN..the bible says that its the wives that are to submit to THEIR husbands..not women to submit to men in society..hope i’ve shed some light..


  16. MARCHETTA Says:

    I really like th comedy ‘GOOD TIMES’ that airs on ktn evry aftrnun.first coz its relevant to th topic on marriage ie submission vs partnership n 2nd coz its jst sooo funny!! btw
    whats ths tlk abt siryering th woman,wh@ daz it mean?neva heard of it so pliz dnt mind th spelling.


  17. hi guys,

    I am 24 going on 25, single chic, with most of my friends dating or married. Seriously, i never buy it when people say that being single is a gift because i keep unraping my gift and there is nothing there just lonelyness, stanigly alone. Dont get me wrong guys i have a life, the most outgoing, fun person you ever met, but lets all just face it society says your lesser. The world has rules and rules must be obeyed or your up against the world.
    that said i wount settle for just anyone but a hope to meet a great guy soon.
    I get to listen to mavuno sermons on the web since im not in nairobi for a while. pliz upload the semon ”looking for love in the wrong places”



  18. The sermon on the role of the husband and wife was great. What was even greater was the story about Johnny 7 Cows


  19. Edward Kobuthi Says:

    I found the 5 R s really captivating. It reminded me of my school days, My Professor would call them mnemonics.

    I found the roots quite interesting especially these days of mixed marriages; coming from different tribes. Even those from the same tribe, Kenya now has a breed of a generation of people who thogh they belong to a certain tribe are for all practical purposes tribeless. They have lived most of thier lives in Nairobi most likely speak English and Kiswahili at home and have known neighbours from other communities. It will be intersting to see how they trace thier roots.
    This group is of particular interest to me because I belong to those Kenyans who grew up in an urban setting and thought little of the tribe we belonged to.
    My first real experience of tribalism was in 2002 when I went for an interview for a position in a region that viewed me as an outsider. shock of shocks this was my district of birth though my parents originated from another district. I was denied the position purely on that basis.


Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: